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Transformation or Death chapter 57

57 – Memory Recovery (3)

sniff

As Cho Ah-yoon twitched her nose, Han Jae-joong silently handed over the tissue. She murmured, making a snoring noise.

“I’m ashamed of the dog…”

He even blew his nose.

Around the eyes, tip of the nose, cheeks, ears, and neck. There was nowhere that wasn’t red. There was no way to tell if this was Pink Deneb or Red Deneb. Her body, red from tears and shame, looked pitiful.

“Why did you do such an embarrassing thing?”

“Then why did you fuck up on the roof?”

I had nothing to say, so I kept my mouth shut. I just had a sore throat and swallowed my saliva. Feeling embarrassed, Han Jaejoong looked around and looked around.

This was Pink Deneb’s house.

After calming down properly, she invited Han Jaejoong to this place.

It was an invitation close to kidnapping.

Before Han Jaejoong came to his senses, he wrapped himself in Hongik-oh and arrived at this place.

I didn’t do anything particularly harsh. Jaejoong Han did not read this book.

It was a very appropriate place to hide and talk at the same time.

Overall, it was a hip-looking interior. Flamingo neon signs on tables and rock band and movie posters pasted throughout the house. Contemporary artistic avant-garde artwork in frame.

The famous character dolls on the sofa alleviated that harsh impression.

Although the reputation of the house was bigger than the house she lived in before, and the decorations were more abundant, the impression Han Jaejoong gave her was the same as the house he had known before.

“…what happened?”

Jo Ah-yoon asked as she hugged a cute deformed pink doll in her arms. It was an obvious expression of anxiety.

“He said he would come back and hadn’t contacted me for several years, why did he act like a homeless person before, why did he get involved with a monster, no, no why… he said he would live a normal life, he said he was just going on a trip. This, this is that trip. is the result of?”

A number of questions came rushing in in an instant, but he kept silent about them all. Rather than a question that wants to hear an answer, it was closer to a question that was more like a projection of resentment.

Han Jaejoong felt like a criminal. In reality, there was nothing different about him. In a moral sense, he was clearly a sinner.

“I should have found out something before… I shouldn’t have just left it unattended… Suicide counseling. Why does my brother go there? He’s the one who always calls out to cherish life. Have your values changed over the years?”

“No, that’s…”

I went there to get the state subsidy. I tried to say that, but I endured it. It would have been like stimulating nerves for no reason.

“U.S….”

Pink Deneb’s voice began to become watery again.

“Do you know how much I’ve been looking for?! I’ve been looking for it for 3 years. Just 3 years! Time for a kid to graduate from high school!”

Han Jaejoong disappeared before the two had time to stop. Pink Deneb and Blue Sirius disappeared while they were hospitalized after being attacked by a monster.

Leaving only letters and a few presents behind.

The first line of the letter still remains as an impressive memory.

‘What do you think moral action is? Respect others’ opinions? Or to protect your opponent? It’s the former by my standards. I’ll just clarify one thing.

Please don’t look for me.

It’s okay to criticize my actions, but please don’t try to deny my actions.

I won’t deny it. It’s okay to run away

But sometimes running away is a good strategy, friend! 🙂

That’s just how it was in my case this time. For now, I won’t have to live either.

don’t worry too much I’ll come back when I think I’m ready. I will also contact you!

My pretty ones, do you believe me?^^ I love you~’

This was just the first paragraph. Even after that, several more phrases were written that would make Yun Seol-hwa and Jo Ah-yoon faint. In fact, Yun Seol-hwa passed out without even reading half of the letter.

“I love you” was overused like a closing sentence and dropped the weight infinitely.

It was a runaway letter that trembled with plague.

At that time, Jo Ah-yoon truly knew what it felt like to have her heart sink.

The pain of being dragged down to the other side of the abyss, with pieces of lead, such as anger and sorrow, entangled in the heart.

“What the hell were you doing? What the hell were we doing behind our backs…”

The afterword was blurred. As I recalled the pain I had been through, it became difficult to control my emotions.

“You found it? Hey, I told you not to look for it because I’ll be back someday.”

“You’re not back, it’s a dog!”

Jo Ah-yoon shouted loudly at the moment. Painful and fierce anger. Jaejoong Han had no choice but to keep his mouth shut at her well-deserved anger.

Silence fell for a moment in the house where her voice was music.

Two pink eyes trembled as if the speaker was more surprised than the listener. The lips have a similar vibration.

She frowned as if to hold back tears, then buried her face in the doll.

“You didn’t come back… you damn brother…”

The sound of the blind nose met obstacles and became a more shabby and pitiful voice.

“…I originally believed it would come back. Because I said so. But it didn’t show up even after a year… Do you know how hard we searched? Hong Ik-oh is natural, and while looking at the moving records and CCTV… But, later on, the records suddenly cut off? It’s like a person really evaporated. I can’t find it…”

“…?”

Jaejoong Han felt a moment of doubt. No matter how strong the association is, it cannot erase all human records.

It is nonsense.

A magical girl tried to find people by using her skills and national information, but couldn’t find a single person?

Of course, since the times are different, it is not easy to collect information outside the province, so you can only read the information inside the safe city…

Even so, it was strange.

Jaejoong Han tried to remember. The memories I just obtained showed me only about half a year after I ran away. I have no memory after that.

It’s been a year since they started looking for it in earnest.

There is a gap.

Han Jaejoong was sure that there must have been some incident in that void. Where were you kidnapped?

‘Or maybe I did something crazy…’

There are limits to where a person can hide. Because the range of human action is limited.

However, the moment you transcend that range, you gain infinite possibilities in terms of seclusion.

An area that no magical girl-like being could find no matter how hard they tried.

There is a place to catch up. An alienated area beyond the province. A land stolen by monsters. An unknown space that has been eliminated from the human survival zone and has not been approached by anyone for the next ten years.

Also known as Dark Matter.

Nicknamed because it is marked black on the map.

If they were there, it would explain why they couldn’t find themselves. But the odds are small. Unless you’re crazy, you won’t set foot there, and even if you go, you won’t come back alive.

“It’s too much to not let them find it… even though they said they’d come back… you bastard bastard… you bastard…”

On the one hand, Jaejoong Han was trembling with anxiety because there was information he didn’t want to find out.

‘I bet you haven’t checked the hospital records…? Let’s pray like that.’

The hardships he had gone through while not being with them would have dealt a fatal blow to Cho Ah-yoon’s mental health, which was already not good.

Being attacked by a mentally ill person was not even something that would be covered by an article in the first place, so I said yes.

In a society where people are dying by monsters every day, there are not one or two people stabbed in the stomach by a mentally ill person.

He could have died, but he wasn’t dead in the end.

Besides, I didn’t even go to the hospital after the first raid.

The mentally ill came to the inside, but it ended with only a slight brushing with the weapon, and rather, they beat it up and sent it back. It is thanks to the fact that after being stabbed in the stomach by a psychopath, he was wary of everything and was sensitively alert.

All of these raids took place in the middle of the night in a remote location with no cctv. Remember wisely. Because I just saw it. A feeling of displeasure washed over his body once again.

Taking all of this into account is not proof that it might not be.

Jaejoong Han looked at Ayoon Jo with a mixed feeling. She too was staring at him with her eyes wide open over the doll. When our eyes met, I buried my face in the doll again.

The words continued again.

“…it was scary.”

Her arms squeezed the doll even harder.

“Wouldn’t everything I do just be a nuisance to my brother… I wonder if I really don’t respect him as the letter said… I wonder if I’ll just get cursed at if I look for no reason… When I was angry before… it was scary. At first, I thought so and endured it. But I couldn’t stand it. It’s fucking disgusting and I know I’m an idiot, but I still wanted to find it. It’s nasty.”

What is the path to respect? It was a question without an answer. I’m sure he would only get hurt if he went back. Those thoughts didn’t leave my head. acted nonetheless.

to respect your heart.

“But… you couldn’t find it. You don’t even know where he was or what he was doing, living or dead.”

But in the end everything failed.

It’s not that I didn’t look for him out of respect for Jaejoong Han, and I couldn’t find him out of respect for myself.

“So… I just wanted you to be well.”

give me something To give up is to give up. Ayun Jo defended herself with that mindset. It was one of her many defense mechanisms.

Passing it over calmly, pretending nothing happened and looking at the next one. Rationalization is the membrane that protects the ego. The harsh reality is a breakwater that makes you think that you are nothing.

“I’m sure he’ll be living well… Because he’s a bold and positive oppa, he’ll be living well anywhere… He’ll be able to go abroad and live happily… The reason he’s not coming back is because he’s living well enough to forget us… .so… continue… continue…”

I didn’t think about the possibility of not giving up.

If you don’t check it, it’s because it’s a possibility. Because there is hope.

Jo Ah-yun was afraid. I chose to stay in fear.

I hope that he is happy now in a place he cannot see.

“But what is this?”

Jo Ah-yoon raised her head. Soon, tears began to flow from her eyes again.

“Isn’t he trembling on the roof after receiving counseling for suicide, isn’t he hospitalized because he was attacked by a monster, isn’t he in the hospital like a homeless person! And why!”

bang! A slender hand hit the desk. With the other hand still holding the doll, she rose from her chair.

“The monster knows my brother…”

Jaejoong Han closed his eyes tightly. I wasn’t surprised. I thought it was coming.

“Do you know how I found your brother today? When I went to the place where the reaction of the monster little star was last, I found that there was a brother… What is this? Why did the little star’s reaction come from my brother?”

One of Hong Ik-oh’s abilities is that he can chase the power of the stars.

The last place to release the transformation was on the roof, so of course there are no traces left there.

Again, Han Jaejoong looked at Joayun. Her eyes, shining like jewels, were watery and radiated a more beautiful light.

“Really…really…it could be unfair. But if you have a clue, tell me, oppa… please…”

Jaejoong Han put his hand on top of hers.

“…Ah Yuna. Two things. I have something to tell you.”

His slightly cold body temperature remained unchanged over the years.

“I have amnesia right now. I know what you and I are related to, but I can’t remember most of the memories I had with you.”

The cold hand trembled.

“What, what are you talking about…”

“And one.”

Before she could express her surprise, he opened his lips in a firm, solemn manner.

“brother….?”

“Ah Yuna. I don’t hate you for doubting me. It’s a reasonable doubt. It’s okay. I won’t hate you. Rather, I’m sorry. I only made you anxious.”

He made up his mind.

The monster’s disguise leaves a clear mark. There is no perfect disguise.

So, if you have a perfectly human body, it paradoxically means that you are not a monster.

“Ah Yuna, I’ll be naked for just five minutes.”

“…?”

“check it.”

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