60. Why do we (1)

It was like a horn announcing the start of a war. Or thunder that heralds a storm.

It was a yawn that Hana woke up from sleep, and it was also a warning and declaration of war to the humans waiting for her on the other side of the cliff.

Whether it was the person who stood on the battlefield 15 years ago or the person who hadn’t, they stopped all their actions and froze.

I heard the sound of a spear and knife falling on the wall and rolling. When the monsters’ air raids and human counterattacks stopped and the flowing clouds kept their place, only the setting sunset signaled the change of time by illuminating the helplessly changing red light.

The commander squeezed his clumsy sword like a straw and looked over the wall. Even 10 minutes ago, the monsters clinging to the wall with the momentum to completely destroy it were nowhere to be seen.

But nobody pointed it out. I just kept my mouth shut and trembled in awe and fear of the existence beyond that wilderness that overwhelmed the world with a single roar.

“Be… Behemoth.”

Someone spoke first.

“Just…that roar was that Behemoth?”

“I came… I really came…”

A rumble began. The people on the walls, whether soldiers or knights, were seized with great terror and began to talk of invisible monsters.

The commander urged the soldiers on the wall who had fallen into a state of panic.

“Where is the time to panic now! The monsters are trying to come up from below right now, but they’re missing the window!”

The commander screamed loudly on purpose and kicked the spear that the soldier had missed. The spear rolled behind the wall and tumbled down the stairs.

“Can you protect the last bastion of this kingdom like that! Can you protect the nape of the kingdom!”

The commander climbed into a column and pointed his finger over the wall.

“Look beyond those walls…”

And, the voice raised in the situation beyond the castle wall was killed. The fingers that had been pointing outward were stiff and trembling thinly.

“Suddenly… what…”

The commander had no choice but to doubt his own eyes. It was because the group of monsters that had been hiding outside the castle wall like the sea disappeared like a mirage as if it had never happened. The wilderness was as cold as an empty sandy beach after the ebb tide. Only piles of corpses were left in front of the wall.

The atmosphere that had changed at the commander’s ardent speech had rather hardened. Paola looked at him and shook her head.

“It’s a big deal.”

Maxime continued to look beyond the walls as if on alert, then turned to face Paola.

“Most of them have completely lost their will to fight. At least the ones who got their heads together seemed to be the only ones who experienced it once 15 years ago. Someone has to come to my senses…”

Paola looked at Maxim with a frown.

“You look surprisingly fine.”

Maxim shrugged. It wasn’t that I didn’t feel fear. He just knew how to get out of fear quickly.

“Should we use it when we are afraid of an enemy we haven’t yet faced?”

There were too many things to be afraid of, to tremble in fear. The curse, the family left behind in the manor, the gradually blurring ego and the crumbling body.

“You are right to be afraid.”

Paola looked Maxim up and down.

“Even the senior who says that doesn’t look like he’s trembling in fear.”

Maxim was watching the soldiers and knights barely find their place. There were no more opponents left to fight, but it didn’t seem to matter to them.

“…How about you step forward?”

Paola sighed. It seemed that he wanted to deny Maxim’s words.

“There is a difference between fear and hatred, Maxim. I’m barely stepping on that boundary, and that’s about it. Originally, I would have dropped my mace to the ground and trembled just like those soldiers.”

To Maxim, said Paola.

“…That’s the Behemoth. My deepest hate meshes with my deepest fear. And the hatred of the Behemoth has never overcome the fear of the Behemoth, Maxim.”

Paola’s hands were shaking slightly.

“…Knowing what those soldiers are afraid of, what more can I say? I can’t. At least there won’t be anyone here who can encourage the soldiers.”

Paola’s words were extremely cold. Maxim had no choice but to agree with him.

The commander was unable to give orders. The soldiers and knights were maintaining a meaningless readiness for battle, and the senior officers who had regained their senses were struggling to return their spirits to normal by grabbing the soldiers one by one.

At that time, there was someone approaching the area where Maxim and Paola were.

“Leave only the minimum number of people and come down from the wall.”

It was a Marquis with gray hair gathered in a ponytail. There was no one who didn’t, but the whole body armor was soaked in blood and messed up, probably from a fairly intense battle.

“Sir Marquis…!”

The Marquis’ face was pale. The bloodstains that splattered on it were like the patterns of barbarian warriors. But apart from that brave figure, the Marquis’ voice trembled with faint fear. When the soldiers and knights did not make any noticeable movements despite the Marquis’ orders, the Marquis shouted and urged them on.

“hurry!”

Only then did the commanding officer follow the Marquis’ orders and give instructions.

“Only the minimum required number of people remain in each location, and everyone goes down the wall! Hurry!”

It was the seniors who moved first. He picks up a spear that has fallen on the floor and strikes his successors with the tip, ordering them to move. After sending down the successors who can’t come to their senses properly, they plan to defend the wall.

“Get down, you bastards.”

“Anyone who hears a cry of a monster and urinates in their pants is going to guard the wall…”

Entering the profanity, not the profanity of the senior officers, the soldiers got out of their seats. Seeing this, the Marquis sighed and walked away looking at Paola. Paola saw the Marquis making a bad expression and spoke in a voice that could not hide her concern.

“…It seems the atmosphere has been sorted out somehow.”

“I don’t know why, but after Behemoth howled, all those monsters disappeared, damn it. What the hell is going to happen?”

Paola looked at the wilderness beneath the castle wall where the monster had disappeared.

“Are the other places okay?”

“The attack was blocked somehow. Except for the fact that morale fell to the ground thanks to that bastard Behemoth.”

The Marquis spoke as if nothing had happened, but his entire body stiffened as if tense.

“It needs to be fixed. I don’t understand why they suddenly withdrew… but when I have a chance, I should properly prepare to face the Behemoth.”

It’s not that you can’t face it by preparing.

The Marquis added as if bitter.

“Do you have any plans?”

“Identification of the injured and dead, and rectification… The pile of corpses piled up over there, we should start by burning them all first. For the f*cking monsters, the pile of corpses piled up over there is a supply and a Saturn for siege.”

The Marquis looked back at Paola and Maxime and asked.

“Any other opinions? If it’s your opinion, I can always accept it.”

The subject of the opinion included Maxim, as if it were natural. Maybe it was because of the influence of the inaction he showed at the cliff at the end before. Maxim looked straight at the anxious-looking figure and spit out a question that suddenly popped into his head.

“Sir Marquis,”

The Marquis slightly turned his head to Maxim.

“Why? Any opinion…”

“If you don’t mind me, can I ask you a question?”

The Marquis nodded once as if to try. Maxim said while keeping an eye on the castle wall, which had been ruined by the blood of monsters and people.

“…If this wall collapses, if the monster breaks through.”

For a moment, the Marquis’s expression wriggled, but Maxim ignored the change in her expression and continued talking.

“Is there a way to deal with it after that?”

Marquis Baek looked at Maxim with cold eyes. The eyes of the white-haired knight, whose whole body was soaked in monster blood, were quite fierce. However, Maxim did not avoid or accept the gaze as before, but instead met it with dry eyes.

“That was a brave statement, Maxim.”

“Don’t you know it’s not the time to be proud, Marquis.”

Maxim was right. Marquis Baek exchanged glances with Maxim for a long time before sighing.

“…You’re right. It’s the front line, the kingdom’s breath, it’s not the time to talk nonsense like that.”

Because if you show your pride like that, the kingdom’s breath could literally be cut off.

“Yes…if this wall collapses…”

The Marquis’ expression darkened. It was impossible for the walls to collapse. Even if a few monsters came over the wall due to a fierce air raid, or even if several huge monsters knocked on the wall and tried to tear it down, the wall remained strong. Fifteen years ago, even when the raging waves of monsters swept through the wilderness, they were never able to cross this wall.

But maybe. If the monster’s attack is more intense than that time, and this wall collapses inevitably.

The Marquis looked at the stones of the wall with cracked surfaces.

“…First of all, the second line of defense will automatically become the Murat region if this place is breached. It is also the place where the residents of the no-man’s-land are now being evacuated.”

The Marquis looked at the road to the city, frowning this time. If you go down the supply route that looks like a trail, you will come to the border city. Now there is an empty city that has sent everyone away, a city that this wall has been protecting and this wall has protected. It was half of the world the Marquis knew, and it was also the place where the Marquis would one day die.

“,,,In that border city, there are magic spells that have been installed everywhere since the war 15 years ago. A very powerful magic that could break the ground was installed by the best wizards of the kingdom at the time.”

Marquis said in a bittersweet voice.

“If this castle falls, that city will meet its end along with the monsters. And it will become the grave of thousands of monsters. I don’t know if I’ll be able to take the Behemoth with me though.”

The Marquis tapped the hilt of his sword.

“But the forces of No Man’s Land won’t let the Behemoths reach the second line of defense, even if it means destroying the city.”

The Marquis’ eyes sharpened. Now, the trembling look seemed to have disappeared. Paola raised her eyebrows in admiration.

“…Our, no, at least my grave will be this border.”

The Margrave laughed, saying that the mission of the Margrave had ended in failure at the point when the castle walls collapsed and the city was destroyed.

“The person who should lead this place shouldn’t say such a thing. It is not the commander who is prepared to die.”

Paola added coldly.

“If the commander is not prepared to die, how will the followers of the commander risk their lives in battle?”

At the words of the Marquis, Paola sighed.

“Just put that into words. Really don’t think so.”

The Marquis shrugged and ordered them to disperse.

“You guys, come down now. You’ll have to help dispose of the body. You’ll have to spend the whole day to clean it all up.”

If you want to go to bed even a little earlier, you’d better hurry up and help dispose of the corpse, the Margrave joked. The sunset in the no man’s land had turned into a purple twilight.

—

“I will die.”

Maxim returned to the barracks and made a sound of pain. It seemed that Maxim was the first to return to the barracks. The barracks, lit by a single lamp, were still empty.

Collecting hundreds of corpses of monsters and burning them was no easy feat. I’d say it’s more difficult than the battle itself. A few wizards made the job easier, but that didn’t mean the knights and soldiers didn’t have a hard time.

“Damn it.”

Maxim sat down on the floor of the barracks, moaning from the vaguely felt muscle pain. More than I thought, my body didn’t listen to me anymore. Even if it was the battle that took place today, it was just a few monsters and running over the castle wall for a while, but my body was broken.

“Shouldn’t have used mana then.”

The feeling of cutting down the werewolf that was leaping after the soldier was clear. Putting mana on the urgency, he leaped. Thanks to that, my stomach was shaking, and the muscles all over my body ached as if they were being torn. I roughly folded my coat and put it in a corner. On a cold summer night in the unchanging no-man’s land, the chill penetrated the ground of the barracks and penetrated Maxim’s bones.

What memories are missing today?

It felt like there was a hole in my mind. Previously, while on vacation, I had a conversation with Christine and realized it. It is the fact that it is not only the body that is being eaten up by the curse.

And the most f*cked up part of that loss is that you don’t even know what memory you’ve lost. He doesn’t know what memories disappear in line with the ongoing curse, or what he originally knew.

The feeling was quite dirty, but also scary. When he woke up, his toe was missing, but it was as if he thought he never had that toe.

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Now I’m comparing it to my toes, but I didn’t know when it would become an ankle, a calf, a thigh, an arm, an eye, or a heart. Perhaps, the memory corresponding to that heart may have already disappeared.

Such thoughts swirled in Maxim’s mind. With a complicated mind, Maxim headed out of the barracks. The area where the soldiers’ barracks were gathered was filled with knights and soldiers returning one by one.

“Uh, Maxim?”

At that time, there was a familiar voice calling Maxim. It was Roberto.

“Where are you going?”

“Just take a walk.”

Maxim involuntarily frowned at his own voice, which was much harder than he thought. Roberto didn’t notice that, and replied in the same voice as usual.

“Sure, come in time for lights out. No matter how much we don’t have to stay vigil, we have to sleep.”

Maxim smiled and turned away from Roberto. Roberto continued to watch Maxim’s back with narrow eyes until he disappeared from sight.

One day, I think something like this happened.

Maxim thought about that as he slowly walked down the street holding a lamp. It was a wasteland with no grass or trees, so the light illuminated the road ahead for a very long distance. A stone was thrown at his feet. someday, just like now. with people walking from far away.

Maxim unconsciously held the lamp high. Then he stopped walking.

A little further away, on the other side, someone was walking. The silhouette was somehow familiar. The people walking by also stopped in their seats, lifting lamps.

“Just…sim?”

Theodora.

Maxim couldn’t look straight into the dark shadow on his face.