3 – stupid fool

“young master!!!”

The maid screamed and rushed at me.

He came closer to me and opened his arms and hugged me.

“I’m sorry…!”

Unfortunately, with an average stat of less than a D, I couldn’t even catch the rush of such a delicate girl.

– Cudangtang!

I fell backwards with a loud noise.

The girl was also lying on her face and hugging me tightly.

“Uh… uh…?”

Because it was such a sudden situation, my head couldn’t type in any commands.

“Eh… uh… uh…?”

While I was spitting out only muffled sounds, I felt my chest get wet.

“Sniff…”

“……?”

Looking back, the girl was crying with her face buried in my chest.

she asked me in a shrill voice.

“Do, Bocchan… You’re really Bocchan…? This isn’t a dream…?”

You’re talking about… Raiden, right?

Now that I’m Raiden…

“Uh…yes…is…right?”

After answering in a slightly unsure voice, the maid’s whimper grew louder.

“Huh… Bocchan… I was worried…”

“Ah… um… yes…”

I didn’t know how to react, so I gently patted the crying maid on the back.

Then, the girl flinched and looked up at me.

“Suddenly… are you really a young boy…?”

“Um… yes…”

It seems like I can only say ‘Ah…’, ‘Um…’, ‘Yes…’, but I can’t help it.

This girl is someone I completely don’t know.

I don’t know if it appeared in the story or not.

Even if she appeared, there was no way she would remember one of the maids of the Lisit family, since she couldn’t even remember the names of all the main heroines right away.

‘Uh… what should I do…?’

While I was so upset,

-Titling!

The sound of the machine, which I was getting used to, rang in my ears.

At the same time, a blue spear floated in the air.

[The ‘synchronization’, a perk of possessing, begins!]

[synchronization]

It is assimilated with Raiden Lisitt’s memories.

You inherit all the emotions and memories that Leiden Lisitt experienced.

You and the Leiden Recitt of the past become one.

[※caution※]

Due to the vast amount of memory and the overflow of emotions, you may feel dizzy.

Shock can cause abnormal conditions such as fainting, vomiting, and insanity.

‘What…?’

no… all of a sudden?

Fainting, vomiting, insanity…?

what is that…

[Synchronization starts.]

“Ugh…!?”

With the notification that synchronization is starting, an excruciating headache began to arise in my head.

At the same time, countless memories start to pass through my head.

– Raiden, you’re awake.

-brother! go together!!

-young master! You must bring your books!!

-Even if it’s an engagement arranged by the family… I think I’m fine…

-Excellent, student Leiden!

Memories passing by like a fast-forward film and voices ringing in the ears.

These were voices I had never heard before.

This… Memories of Raiden Lisit…

“Ugh…!!”

“Do, Bocchan…?”

As the memories flowed in, the pain grew stronger.

A bizarre sensation, as if a part of my brain had been cut out and joined to someone else’s.

-It’s disappointing, Raiden.

-Brother… Why did you change like that…?

-Do, Bocchan…?

-Garbage…

-Warning, student Raiden.

As the memory progresses, the voices ringing in my ears grow colder.

At the same time, my heart beats fast, and my chest hurts.

Painful and painful feelings.

This… wasn’t what I was feeling.

This…

‘My body… the feelings Raiden feels…?’

my head feels like it’s about to break

“Ughhh! Uhhh!!”

“young master!!”

In the end, I am screaming.

Even after the transfer of memories has ended, the echoes in my head do not stop.

This time it wasn’t Raiden’s memories.

It was my memory.

-Titling!

[I suffer from ‘mental abnormality (trauma)’ due to the reaction of the memory transmission!]

-It is said that Kim Na-ru is a national team, but isn’t it really a dog bubble? haha

-Eh, you idiot, can’t you win first place with that?

– To be honest, getting to the finals was also Dae Jin luck haha

– Seeing you lose without hitting even one in the finals? ㅋ I think I’ll do better than that haha

Malicious comments on the Internet become voices and tingle in my ears.

And among the loud noises, the father’s voice pierced his ears sharply.

– You trash guy. you are not my son

I’m short of breath

Lungs refuse to breathe.

“Kukkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk?”

-Titling!

[Skill ‘Spirit of Iron’ resists status abnormalities (trauma)!]

[Status abnormality (trauma) is nullified!]

“Kuhhhh”

As the echoes in my head disappeared, my breathing returned.

My whole body twitched and convulsed.

I vomited at the creepy sensation, but I tried to hold it in.

While I was taking a deep breath, the maid who was holding me held my hand and said.

“Bocchan…!! Why are you doing that all of a sudden…!!!”

Perhaps because she saw me panting, the maid went into a panic.

Watching her crying, not knowing what to do, complicated emotions stirred inside me.

I quietly held her hand and called her name.

“young master?”

“Calm down, Rachel…”

Rachel.

A maid who has been by Raiden’s side since he was a child.

Even after Raiden changed, the maid remained unchangingly devoted.

And dear… my friend.

“Suddenly… Bocchan…?”

“Yes, Rachel… I’m back…”

Rachel burst into tears again at those words.

I looked at her with complicated eyes.

-Titling!

The status window popped up once again.

[Due to extreme mental exhaustion, you fall into a state abnormality (fainting).]

Oh no…

Genja…

– Took

Mind is broken.

.

.

.

Leiden Lisitt was a child loved by everyone.

be polite to superiors,

He was merciful to those below him,

I knew how to care for the people around me.

Even though he had no natural talent and was a bit chubby due to lack of exercise, people liked him.

He was the proud son of his parents,

He was a respected older brother to his younger sister.

He was a cute little boy to the servants.

Leiden Lisitt was a boy who knew how to give love to people and how to receive love.

However, there was a time when he, who thought he would grow up straight, was crushed.

by the time he was 16.

his mother died

The cause of death is assassination.

The day Raiden and his mother went out leisurely.

– Hee hee hee! bang!

A roar echoed with the screams of the horses, and the carriage was smashed to pieces.

Unidentified assailants await them as they escape from the wreckage of the wrecked wagon.

There was an escort knight, but he was hit by shrapnel when the wagon broke and his right arm was broken.

they said

“If you hand over the Raiden Recital, I’ll let the rest live.”

Mother shouted, blocking their way.

“No way!”

Then he told the escort driver.

“Take Raiden and run away.”

“Yes?! But…”

“I hurt my leg anyway, so I can’t run away.”

“No! As an escort knight…”

“Are we all going to die here!? It’s an order! Take Raiden and run!!”

The escort driver, who had been shouting no, clenched his teeth at his mother’s screams.

In the end, he fled with Raiden over his left shoulder.

Holding onto Raiden, who was struggling to say no.

“No! No!! Mother!!!”

Raiden saw clearly in his receding vision.

The image of a mother clumsily gripping a sword with trembling hands.

The assailants who laugh at such a mother.

and…

– Push!

A single sword that pierces through mother’s stomach.

The death of his mother, whom he had depended on the most since childhood, came as a huge shock to Raiden.

And such a death greatly distorted his state of mind.

He was devastated that his mother had died for him.

The person he loved died in his place because he loved him.

At this thought, he collapsed.

Day after day was spent getting drunk, and his judgment was clouded by being drunk all day.

And such poor judgment leads him to the absurd conclusion that his mother died because she loved him.

‘If she hadn’t loved me, my mother wouldn’t have died. Because my mother loves me… because she loves me…’

The thought he had been thinking about all day became an obsession for him.

Since then, he has refused to be loved.

I didn’t give love to others like before, and I did bad things to avoid receiving love.

“You can only do this once in a while?!”

Spitting out abusive language towards the servants of the mansion,

“You don’t have a taste bud!!”

Tossing the food on the table,

“Hiccup… have you been drinking? Ai… what’s your father to do with you!!”

drank every day

“Hey there, isn’t it pretty? Tonight with me…”

At the academy, flirting with female students,

“It’s such a boring class.”

I also listened to the class.

He became a madman due to such a broken mental state.

However, perhaps because of his tender heart, he couldn’t really cross the line, such as using violence or hugging a woman.

However, that was enough to earn the world’s hatred.

Rumors about him continued to grow in the academy.

Rumors circulated that he, who had never hugged a woman before, was collecting s*x slaves as a collection.

Rumors circulated that he had never beaten anyone before, and that he assaulted servants.

The fact that the eldest son of the duchy was a fool was a rumor of such a provocative subject that rumors about him spread far and wide.

Raiden felt satisfied with that.

“Now no one will die because of me…”

As he muttered, he smiled alone in the dark room.

He was a very stupid 17-year-old boy.

That’s how he continued to do crazy things and spent each day.

So time passed and when he turned 18.

He met a man at the academy.

A boy who was called the best talent among the first year of ‘Alan Reinhardt’ academy.

He said, throwing his glove at Raiden, who was poking at the female students as usual.

“I challenge you to a duel, Raiden Lisit. Don’t bother my friends and stick with me.”

Raiden laughed inwardly and accepted it.

‘You’re giving me more opportunities to be hated and ridiculed!’

He even thanked Alan for the duel.

And that day, Raiden was beaten like a dog on a rainy day.

The students who watched the duel cheered, and the female students sent hot eyes toward Alan.

Alan said to Raiden with a smug expression.

“Don’t get out of my sight again.”

After the duel, Raiden returned to the dormitory.

I sat alone in an empty room.

The wound was so painful.

But it was fine.

No one cared about him.

But it was fine.

Everyone glared at him with contemptuous eyes.

But it was fine.

……

……really…

Are you really okay…?

He felt a pang of sadness in his heart.

and felt the pain

I felt lonely.

But he quietly patted himself.

“I must be hated. If everyone hates me, no one will die for me…”

After saying that, she quietly smiled and went to sleep.

His broken accident was like a car with a broken steering wheel.

Even if you are running in the wrong direction, you can’t run in the wrong direction and keep moving forward.

wrecked car.

And Raiden’s broken thinking eventually leads to ruin.

A few days after the duel happened.

His younger sister, who entered the academy as a freshman, came to visit him.

Perhaps she had heard about the last duel, but she was in a state of fury.

she shouted at him.

“Why! Why are you doing this!! Please just keep quiet!!!”

His sister, who was cute and gentle in the past, has turned into a sharp and cold figure to him.

Raiden felt a bit bitter about her appearance, but he didn’t show it, and reacted roughly with his usual awkward attitude.

His sister was tired of his attitude.

I thought that I would no longer be able to wait for my brother who was gentle and warm in the past.

Was that so?

Words I would never have said normally came out of my mouth.

“Rather… that day, you should have died instead of my mother…”

Raiden hardened like ice at her words.