93 – Ask if you don’t know – 1

This is not it.

I don’t want this.

All he wanted was for Hyeonu to fool around and reveal his greed.

If that’s the case, I can accept it with a smile.

“Ah, no… Hey. I, I. Tongue, Hyeonu…hey.”

I didn’t want this.

Thinking to herself, Veronica blankly watched the sage.

“Ahhhh … Black .. Black …. Levantia, don’t get angry! Ahhhh … Black. .. Uaaa!! kaaa!!

Reventia’s face distorted the more she heard his screams.

Veronica and Cecil, shocked by the sage’s appearance, turn white.

Only then did they realize

A sage who was always strong.

A sage who easily passed through any pain.

He always looked at the future rather than the past with a margin, his true heart that was hidden.

“aaa!!”

His unstoppable screams were a cold reality that revealed the wounds and pain the sage had suffered so far.

“Tongue… Hyeonu… Hey? Hyeonu… Hyeonu… Hey…”

What shocked Leventia was the same.

No, perhaps it was she who was shocked by Hyeonu’s appearance more than anyone else here.

It had to be.

he was always strong

No matter what happened, I was not shaken.

That he was in so much pain?

The one who lightly rejected any scolding, criticism, and hardships and adversity?

want to deny

However, the reality in front of her was coldly preventing her from averting her eyes.

“Ah. aaa…”

Is it because of the enormous stress and self-loathing?

A headache that seemed to split my head more than when I was dealing with the demon lord began to come.

Leventia trembled with unbearable disgust.

I.

What did you do?

“Tongue, Hyeonu…”

“aaang!!”

The moment the unconsciously outstretched hand touched it, the state of the sage changed.

stop crying

No, it has not stopped.

He puts his fist into his mouth, giggles, and endures crying.

What does it mean?

“Kuk… Heh… Kkeut… Kuk… Swish… Swish… Ah, I won’t cry… I won’t. Hee, it’s hard No, I won’t… Sniff. …”

“……”

“I, say bad things, I won’t respond if you say something bad… hehe… uhhh… uhhhh.

bad words?

that’s a bad word

But you didn’t care about that.

you’ve always been fine

What had happened during the journey of defeating the demon lord quickly entered her mind.

at that time.

What have I done?

Why did I hurt him?

But why was he laughing?

“Ah ah ah ah ah!!!”

He thought he wouldn’t get hurt.

He thought he was not suffering.

He always knew he was strong.

But the sage was also the same person.

Suffering from malice, hurt from belittling, and weeping from accusations.

He was just an ordinary person.

He was just enduring it.

Only then did Leventia face the truth she had been ignoring.

“…under.”

Did what he said hurt him like this?

“Ha ha ha… a ha ha…”

He didn’t even get angry at his stupidity and indifference.

What did you do to the person who hurt and tormented you so much?

want to be your subordinate?

Will you become your limbs and do anything?

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Just looking at myself makes me feel so much pain.

Even if you stay away from him and never show your face, you approach him saying that you will play the role of that proud knight?

Was it worth that much to you?

“hahahaha… Ahahaha… hahahaha! hahaha!! Stupid… Stupid…!!!”

-Jaaa!!

I can’t stand it.

I can’t stand my own indifference.

You can’t overcome your own shamelessness.

Leventia started slapping her in the face several times, and when Cecile grabbed her arm, Leventia spoke weakly, shedding tears.

“Please… me…”

Unable to finish her words, Leventia fainted from the immense stress.

Veronica didn’t just sit idly by.

“…Hyunwoo. Hyeonu…”

“Hee, hee, hee… heh… heh… heh… heh heh… heh…”

“It’s okay. It’s okay. I’ll be by your side. I’ll stop anyone who bullies you.”

Hugging Hyeonu tightly, she patted him on the back.

Although he was said to have suffered from infantile regression, the wise man’s body retained its strength.

That’s why it was never easy to stop struggling, but I had to do it.

I was afraid that his struggle might not overcome his fear and hurt himself.

Veronica hugged him with all her might and bit her lip.

‘Oh God. Why… why are you giving this person this pain…’

Ever since I became acquainted with the sage, I always prayed for him.

May what he wants to achieve come true.

May the wise always be happy.

I hope he gets a little more comfortable.

But why

Why does this person have to suffer so much because of what he did wrong?

For the first time since becoming a priest, Veronica harbored a grudge against God.

But I couldn’t reveal that resentment now.

Because what she had to do was to take care of the wounded as a priest.

“Because it’s okay. Huh? Stop crying…”

“Higuk… Sniff… Heuk… Heuhuhheuk… aaah…

“It’s okay… It’s okay… No one bothers you. So… Huh?”

Hyeonu had a wall in his heart.

A mental illness that blocks not only the bad feelings of others, but also goodwill.

If he lost control of himself while holding it and complained of pain, no one might be able to appease him.

Still, Veronica couldn’t stop.

Isn’t that what we were determined to do in the first place?

What she wanted to get into the walls of the wise man’s heart was what she hoped for, and hoped for again.

So you have to collide.

Even if it’s so hard to face him.

“…Nope.”

Now is not the time to think about such things.

Hugging the crying and pleading sage, Veronica closed her eyes.

The important thing now is to soothe the wounded soul in front of me.

It doesn’t matter what I’m struggling with.

Because that’s what priests do.

Veronica smoothed her voice.

A hymn sung at an orphanage in the past to soothe and put the children to sleep.

He sang the song of a patron saint who heals and takes care of suffering children.

“Good night… good night… sweet baby…”

“Huh… uhhh… uhhhhh… huh…”

no use.

No matter what you do, no matter how comforting you are.

How great is the fear and pain inherent in the sage.

There was nothing that could save him from the nightmare.

Veronica felt a deep sense of self-doubt well up.

The horse is a cardinal, but if pure holy power is taken into account, even if she ascends to the position of Pope immediately, there will be no problem for her.

He practiced for a long time, studied, and wanted to save many people.

After becoming a Heretic Questioner, he saved those who were about to be sacrificed by cults, and saved children suffering from war and violence.

And those who praised her not only in the church but also anywhere on the continent could easily be found.

However.

What good is that?

I can’t heal a single wounded person in front of me?

Veronica trembled at the pain of denying everything she had done so far.

“Sleep well… Good night… Beloved baby…”

At the same time as he became angry at his own inadequacies, a tremendous sense of helplessness came.

I don’t want to do anything.

‘Cause I can’t even do this

“Like a bee sleeping on a petal…”

– Eww.

Swept away by endless negative emotions, Veronica bit her lip.

The fishy taste of blood relieves headaches caused by rising stress and awakens the spirit sinking in despair.

I can’t just sit around stupidly.

Hyunwoo is in so much pain right now, right?

So. You have to do what you can.

And, there is only one thing you can do now.

Bodeum soothes him calmly, sings a hymn to soothe his mental burden, and puts him to sleep at least a little comfortably.

“Sleep in peace…”

Is it because of her efforts?

The chant filled with holy power eased the sage’s tears a little.

After some lull, Cecile called Cyron.

“Cyron. You said you had experience? How was it then? How can I make him a little more comfortable?”

“Well.”

Cyron glanced at the corner of the room.

The sage barely fell asleep, but woke up not long after, ignoring everyone’s worries and running away to the corner of the room with a whimper.

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Just like the wise man who couldn’t appease even the High Priest of Hasti, who took care of so many people suffering from infantile degeneration.

He hid himself in the corner of the room, curled up like a frightened child, and fell asleep lightly.

But that peace won’t last long.

I fell asleep like that You’ll have nightmares and wake up complaining of pain.

Cyron looked at it sadly and sighed.

“…Even the High Priestess of Hariti raised both hands and feet. It’s as if the goodwill being conveyed is blocked by something.”

wall of the mind.

Veronica suppressed the rising sense of helplessness by biting her lips.

I couldn’t help but feel my heart wear out every time I saw the wise man sobbing and talking in his sleep.

“You knew it would be like this, right?”

Cecile asked in a heavy tone, and Cyron nodded.

“Yeah. That’s why I and the sage also said it. It would be better not to look.”

It took about 30 minutes at most for the wise man to reveal his true feelings after suffering from infantile regression.

But that short amount of time was enough.

Both Veronica and Cecil were haggard as if they had fought a fierce battle.

In addition, Leventia, who had just escaped from infantile regression, had not awakened from fainting despite the sage’s efforts.

“Then why don’t you just leave it like that?”

“What can I do? All I can do is… make him drink water so he doesn’t get dehydrated when he wakes up. But that’s good.”

Cyron rubbed his face.

“Because it only lasts for two days.”

fortunately

What if you have to live like that for more than half a year?

Driven by fear, he did not know that he would die without being able to overcome the enormous stress.

“…That’s amazing. Did you go to receive Hariti’s protection because you thought you were like this?”

Cecile looked at the sage and spoke with a subdued voice, while Cyron laughed.

“Anyway. The important thing now is who takes care of the sage. And. I’ll have to do that as well.”

“…You? Why?”

“Yes. Look at your expressions.”

Cyron held up a mirror and showed it. The faces of Cecil and Veronica reflected in the mirror looked as if they would collapse at any moment.

“So I think it would be better for me to do it.”

“…still.”

“In addition, the High Priestess of Hariti told me that when that state is reached, most people will be in a state of severe lack of affection.”

“therefore?”

“They say they feel extreme fear of being alone when they wake up. That’s why you need someone to hug you when you sleep. And what’s that?”

“What?”

The Cyron blushed for a moment, then hesitantly shouted.

“There’s something like that! What are you trying to know?!”

“Anyway… you mean you have to sleep because you can’t leave me alone?”

“Uh, yes. Isn’t it common sense for children to sleep with their parents? Of course, if you’re shy, you don’t have to. It’s me, well, I owe a lot to the wise man and I don’t have a boyfriend, so it’s okay. Ah. It’s okay not to worry about grades. The sage of…”

“…I wasn’t like that even when I was fine. I’m not worried about that part.”

Veronica, who was very offended by the way she spoke as if she knew the sage better, bluntly said,

“And like I said before, I’m fine.”

“Then what… The cardinal-nim has it? Eh. I’ll wait in the next room. Call me if you don’t want to. Oh, and the Prince.”

“…Well?”

“Why don’t you put Leventia away?”

Pointing to Leventia, who was fainting, Cyron spoke coldly.

“The warrior’s party is one of the causes of his fear and pain, but I can’t keep him nearby.”

At that, Veronica tilted her head.

‘One of the causes… one?’

So, are you saying that there are other reasons besides them that cause him to suffer so much?

Cyron scratched his temple as Veronica looked.

“I don’t know either. The High Priestess of Hariti only informed me while conducting psychotherapy.”

Receiving the curious gazes of the women, Sailon spoke earnestly.

“All I know is that it’s not just the warrior party he fears.”

gulp.

Cyron gave the information to the two who were nervous.

“All he really wants is to go home. Maybe that will erase the fear inside the sage.”

“…ah.”

okay.

In what the sage cried and said, there were clues to what he wanted.

home, and I want to go back.

“The important thing is. No one knows where the sage’s house is, where is his hometown, who his parents are, who he is. Why can he know so many things and use the skills of all occupations?”

Cyron paused for a moment and smiled bitterly.

“I don’t even know why he helps people.”

Because the wise man suddenly appeared in this world one day, only the wise man knew everything about him.

Veronica and Cecil were able to realize what that meant.

Knowing nothing, it was quite a long way from appeasing him.

After Leventia was carried away by the Knights of the Principality, Sairon and Cecil rose from their seats.

“I have some research to do. Today, Cardinal. I leave you with the Sage.”

“I’ll be in the next room. Put the sage on the bed.”

“…yes.”

“Call me if anything happens.”

Cyron and Cecil leave.

With this, the only ones left in the room were the sage and himself.

Veronica propped herself up in the small gap next to the bed and gently lifted the sleeping sage while talking in her sleep.

don’t break

I wish you some comfort.

Laying him down on the wide bed, Veronica lay down on his side and wiped the wise man’s face, his tear-stained face with a handkerchief, and started the only thing he could do right now.

“Good night… good night. Sweet baby. Good night. Good night. Sweet baby. Like a petal sleeping in the light. I will keep the scary monster under the bed at bay. Good night. Good night. Sweet baby. In the dark.” Stop crying and go to the land of dreams…”

Veronica gently hugged him. And, soft enough not to wake up, Veronica quietly sang the chant.

Is it because of the many things that happened today, or because of the smell of Hyeonu in his arms? Falling asleep little by little

Veronica, who had been singing the chant, barely driving away the soma, was able to close her eyes only after confirming that the sage’s fearful drowsiness in her arms was gradually diminishing.