59 – my own way – 2

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“…This is dangerous.”

The mood of the party has changed since Chapter 3 of the main story.

No, originally, it must have been from the end of Chapter 1. When I first said that I was going to follow the warrior party, the three existing warrior party members were quite worried about me.

It was worth it. In any case, Claire, Leventia, and Evangeline move under the protection of the official warrior party members.

But I don’t have any of that, so it was only natural for me to worry that I might suffer during the arduous journey.

That’s why the three of them cared about my convenience, and in the process I thought we had a good relationship in our own way.

That’s why I was able to support the three with a happy heart, and at the same time, I was able to work on my achievements in my spare time.

Chapter 3 is what went wrong. It was after what happened in Baekeun Village.

After passing the Pale Moon event, Leventia became jealous of me, and Evangeline began to look down on me.

Of course, I expected something similar to happen when I first entered the warrior party.

I am the fourth party member who shouldn’t exist.

Even in the game, if you use a trick to add an additional party member, the favorability of the added party member quickly declines.

As if reflecting that, the relationship between the party members began to creak.

In the game, it is the player’s job to cover it, that is, the warrior’s job, but that method is something only players who have seen the ending several times can do it skillfully.

In a way, it was only natural that Claire, who was weak and weak, had a hard time coordinating the party.

Normally, if there is a discord between parties in this way, the party member will simply leave the party.

But if that were the case from my point of view now, what would the warrior party be like?

“Ummm…”

nothing to see I remembered what happened during the mid-boss of Chapter 5.

It was before I learned the wide area heal, so I suggested that I learn it and challenge it, but the warrior party went straight to the mid-boss battle.

In a situation where there was no proper healer, the warrior party was in danger while catching the mid-boss, and if I, who had barely learned a wide-area heal, hadn’t narrowly joined, the game might have been over.

Since then, similar incidents have occurred by ignoring my suggestions several times, and as the journey continued, the atmosphere at the party gradually fell into hell.

The problem is that I am also a human being.

No matter how determined I was, I felt like I was about to lose my mind when I continued to be harassed and sold out, and when I didn’t go in the right direction I suggested and made a stern choice, the damage occurred.

And yesterday, in the end, I couldn’t stand it and threw my anger away.

“Ah. sh*t.”

I thought it wouldn’t be easy, but I never thought it would be this much. I covered my face.

If Claire hadn’t desperately stopped him yesterday, he would probably have fought Leventiana and Evangeline by the collar.

Ugh.

Anyway, it shouldn’t be like this.

Since I am also a human being, my emotions may wear out and my heart may break.

Especially, this world is a tough world. I also had to do something to cope with the buildup of stress and the anxiety that I could die during the journey.

-smart.

“come in.”

“Hey… Hyeonu. Are you okay?”

It was Claire who opened the door and came in. I looked at him in moderation and tried to smile, but he must have been very worried.

However, in my currently unstable state of mind, Claire’s worries were nothing more than arousing irritation and anger.

She is a warrior and the leader of this party.

If a problem arises between party members, it must be resolved through mediation. However, Claire’s clumsy management was overwhelming just by leading the journey, and I couldn’t get angry with me as a deceased person.

In the end, the burden of the party comes on me, and the biggest cause is her.

That’s why I can’t help but feel annoyed by Claire’s appearance like that.

But I couldn’t say it.

If you blame it here, only Claire will get hurt, and it will eventually help to deepen the rift in the party.

Then, defeating the demon lord is over the water.

“Yeah. I’m fine.”

“Hey. We decided to take a break for the time being.”

“…yes?”

“Leventia and Evangeline are like that. Everyone seems to be mentally concentrated. You seem to be having a hard time too.”

What’s up?

Let’s go catch the demon king as soon as possible. If that’s not the case, even if you level up, you’re resting at a point where it won’t be enough?

no. Can not be done.

Dangerous.

Anger rises again.

I looked at Claire and nodded.

okay. Now I have to take the risk and prepare myself.

“That’s why. We went to a resort together…”

“It’s great. I have a place to go too.”

“uh?”

Claire’s eyes widened in surprise and I smiled at her.

“Ha, but.”

“it’s okay.”

I patted Claire on the shoulder. I knew what she was worried about.

Even though the child is weak-minded, he is not stupid. If I drop out of the party right now, you know how big of a risk it is to the party.

But if it stays as it is now, it’s more dangerous.

In the worst case, I might kill them all with my own hands.

I told Claire to put a stop to our journey until I got back. Never do it even if Leventiana Evangeline recommends it.

Now that I’ve said this much, no matter how weak-minded Claire is, she won’t be able to move recklessly.

After saying that to Claire and leaving the party, I recalled the memory of the game.

This game values the mind enough to say that fighting stress is half the battle.

When stress builds up, you often get status abnormalities, which soon develop into mental illness.

Among those mental illnesses, there are those that control the body, but there are also those that control the emotions.

Based on that, what I need to do now is find a way to not stress the transmission of negative emotions.

Fortunately, there is a mental illness associated with it in the game.

It was the ‘wall of the heart’, the highest level of mental illness.

It is a very troublesome disease even in the game, literally building a wall in the mind and blocking the opponent’s emotional approach.

As you progress through the game, the stress accumulated from discord between party members or NPCs, incorrect conversations, and minor misunderstandings has a great effect on your stats.

However, it is easy to see cases where people get out of a crisis through cheering or events between party members, but when a wall in their heart arises, they give up all those benefits.

In the current situation, it’s rather me to convey emotions, so it’s better to build a wall of mind and focus on breaking the main story as much as possible.

I clenched my fists and made up my mind.

The way to get the wall of mind in the game is simpler than you think, and there are achievements you have to take care of while getting this bottle.

So let’s not be anxious.

It’s filthy and hard to treat as a superlative mental illness, but there’s nothing wrong with it.

The only problem is that you can’t get out of this dangerous world forever.

so.

“Come on. Let’s do it.”

100 Mental Illness Challenge.

It starts now.

He suffered from mental illness and repeated treatment.

After all, when I was treated after having my 100th mental illness.

[You have achieved the General Mental Hospital achievement.]

[Caught on the ‘wall of the heart’.]

I have been able to see myself objectively.

it’s finally caught

On the wall of the mind, one of the top-tier psychopaths in the game.

It was hard work for almost a month, but it was worth it.

When you have achieved your goal and returned.

In the village I left, Leventia and Evangeline greeted me with sullen faces.

“Where the hell have you been? It’s been delayed for a month because of you!”

“Huh. Human. Does it feel good to come back from playing alone? I really can’t use it. Follow me. I’ll train you well enough to suit Evangeline-sama.”

As soon as it comes back, it starts to grind and sell.

But is it because of the wall of the heart? Unlike before, their criticism did not hurt me in any way.

Read at noblemtl. com

Just listen in one ear and let it out in the other.

It really works for sure!

“Hey, that’s Hyeonu…”

As if to relieve the stress that had accumulated during my absence, the two of them, who had been belittling and ridiculing me for a long time, went out wildly, and Claire came over.

“Are you okay…ah? Your face is very damaged. Where have you been…?”

Go to the battlefield, and get some achievements along the way. Run the dungeon alone.

Literally did everything to get me mentally ill.

It was a rewarding time in itself. Among the achievement rewards obtained while doing this, I also got teleportation, which is considered one of the most efficient.

“Huh? That, but. I…”

I smiled at Claire, who looked at me worriedly.

They must have thought that I had left the party altogether because I had left without contacting them until now.

“It’s nothing. It’s okay if you don’t mind. There’s no reason for me to leave you guys.”

okay.

There was no reason for me to leave.

Until you defeat the Demon King.

“Th… but. Are you okay? I’ve told the kids… but from now on I’ll be nice to you…”

Stumbling around, Claire defended them as if making an excuse, but I shook my head.

If it had been before, I would have been hurt by their unreasonable selling, but now, surprisingly, I have no feelings.

Because I didn’t think it was anything but someone else’s job anyway.

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“…what do you think?”

At Veronica’s words, I escaped from the flashbacks of the past.

The wall in my heart was still there.

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Just because there is a wall in your heart doesn’t mean you deny human relationships at all, so there are no problems in your life.

There were so many comfortable parts, so I left it without treatment.

Well, I can’t deny that treatment took a lot of time and effort, so I put it off until later.

“I’m trying to make up my mind.”

“…why are you catching them?”

“Ehehe. Friend. I’m a man too.”

I took my hand off Veronica’s back. The scene where dripping oil touches her clean skin and rolls around was quite mesmerizing.

“That’s right?”

“Would you believe me if I showed you after 5 minutes?

“…Hey, what are you talking about?!”

To be rather unreasonable angry at a subject who had done something unreasonable to temptation just a moment ago.

Despite that shamelessness, I turned around instead of getting hurt a little.

“Do it yourself in the future. Or call the staff.”

“…Yes.”

No matter how much it was, I couldn’t ask for it to be applied to the front. Veronica replied in a hesitant voice, and I closed the bottle of oil.

“…Master.”

It was then. Lucille called me with a slightly quieter voice. with eyes narrowed. Lucille, who had only bitten her lips, hesitated with her eyes closed, then shouted with all her might.

“I-please apply me too!”

Call the staff.

Anyway, there’s nothing I can’t do if I ask for it. I also oiled Lucille’s back and decided to take a break.

“Would you like Master to apply it too?”

“No. I’m fine. Rather than that, shouldn’t I study a bit?”

“Ah… yes. That’s right.”

Lucille started to talk about the contents of the duel that took place earlier. What she felt and what she did wrong. and many other things.

After listening for a while, I nodded.

“Definitely. It’s hard to continue the combo if the card doesn’t come out when you want it.”

“Yes… that’s a bit of a headache. It’s also the greatest weakness of magic decks.”

After thinking for a while, Lucille smiled and grabbed me.

“So… Master always draws the card he wants, right?”

“right?”

“That. Can you learn it?”

“…Uh. Mmm.”

A true duelist should be able to draw the cards he wants, when he wants, but…

No matter how much, I can’t teach you to take out the bottom with your heart.

“Don’t resort to such trivial tricks and practice more.”

“yes…”

Lucille nodded in regret, and I turned my head to the gaze I felt behind me.

Veronica was watching, squinting, and I laughed.

I knew what those eyes were saying, but thanks to the wall in my heart, I wasn’t hurt in any way.

It seems to be true that the saying that using a bottle well can help.