128 – symbol-6

“Tell me slowly. What do you see?”

As she removed her hand from her shoulder for a moment, her focus shifted. As if someone was calling from behind.

“So… there’s a lot of enerel. The voices are coming from all over the place, so many that I can’t tell who’s real.”

“Since when?”

The spiritual power of the clergy, of course, was stronger than that of ordinary people.

The protection of divine power was stronger against mental attacks than physical power, and even if it wasn’t, the priest was the first person to cure it when someone was caught up in an illusion.

But if it’s her own, Celia’s own mind that’s the problem, the story is a bit different.

“It got worse after coming here… but it’s been like that since before. Ever since I was in the imperial palace.”

“Is that why you covered your eyes?”

“That’s because it’s hard to tell them apart. Once you cover your eyes, you can tell that the Enerel you see is fake…”

I didn’t know. However, I couldn’t say why I said that now.

How would I have reacted if I found out about the fact while I was fighting the Orc Lord in the imperial palace?

I don’t know the future, but at least I wouldn’t have tried to comfort her or find a solution.

I just thought I didn’t need it, so I left it alone, told me not to follow it, and left.

Of course, if I did, I would have lost miserably in the fight against the elves inside the World Tree, and my journey would have ended.

At least that fight was not a fight that could be sustained without a priest. My wounds were much worse, and if it wasn’t for Celia, I wouldn’t have even started a conversation or anything.

“I… I feel useless now.”

“No, no. At least right now… No, stay until you catch the demon dragon. In the first place, you can’t go back alone right now, can you?”

Even though they are weak compared to our strength, Celia, the priest, is not an easy enemy to defeat alone.

Even if one or two of those Shinsou could be dealt with somehow, Celia was too weak to withstand a surprise attack or series of battles.

“Really, you’re kind to the end. That’s why… I didn’t want to tell you.”

My eyes met Celia’s. Her eyes were as steady as lies.

“There’s no need to worry about it.”

“It’s not like that!”

I hate killing myself, but I don’t mind dying somewhere. With that thought in mind, I traveled with her.

No, I think I believed I was thinking that way.

“It’s because it’s necessary. Anyway, this party needs a priest.”

“For a little while, Mr. Farseer could replace me. And besides… no one will need such an anxious cleric.”

She wasn’t completely wrong. Because there was no party that welcomed the anxious clergy. Officially, the most dangerous next to the unsettled wizard was the unsettled cleric.

Right now, it’s a shame because the healing spell doesn’t go anywhere, but the moment a strengthening or healing spell enters the enemy, of course, the battle to be won has no choice but to end in defeat.

However, I couldn’t bear to choose the option of abandoning her.

Whether you hate it or like it, of course you hate it. Celia is some of the most terrifying memories I have.

But I received a lot from her. At least she didn’t try to harass me directly with malice, and at least she was the one who tried to take care of me after I returned home.

“you…”

Really, what if I had accepted her offer. If only we were a little more kind to them, saying let’s forget the past and make last memories.

It’s about Farseer, as long as I reveal that I’m a hero, I’ll bow down without any problems.

Nerwen, you were confused by the smell right away, so you will be forced to smile when a seat is created.

After all, Eleanor might tell you to sacrifice for the Empire. However, what happened when I was persuaded by words that it couldn’t be?

It was unbelievable. Now, Celia’s wish to live ‘happily ever after’ was close to impossible, no matter how much she thought about attaching a family to a family.

I couldn’t have acted that way, and even if I did, there’s no way others would have adapted to me.

“I’m sorry, Enerel.”

“Well, you can get sick as long as you live.”

It wasn’t something that could be passed that way, but there was no point in blaming Celia now.

“Rest for now. There’s nothing you can do about it. Slowly, let’s think about how we can get better.”

“I’m not saying that.”

“So, what happened during the journey? It’s kind of upsetting, but it’s not something I can do right now. You’re the best out of the four…”

Tears welled up in Celia’s eyes. her voice was trembling.

“I’m really, really sorry about that too. I’m so sorry beyond words. But, that’s not it.”

“Then what is it?”

“Are you happy now?”

At the weighty question that came out of nowhere, I paused and thought.

Are you happy or not happy?

Of course, it wasn’t pleasant to wander around the sea that suddenly appeared in the Farseer’s shield. Other than that, riding around the forest in a wagon was a bit boring and uncomfortable, but it wasn’t necessarily unpleasant.

Eating salty, salty beef jerky as if your body is draining all of its water is not objectively happy.

However, it is a body that has already become accustomed to countless foods. There were a lot of things I went through that made me feel that bad, and I didn’t have any special feelings now.

The process was a bit inconvenient, but playing the hero was somehow fun. It was sad and painful to have to kill someone, to have someone die because of my mistake, of course, but it was enjoyable that I did something and gained a little peace.

“Well…”

Before that, it was a world tree. Was I happy there, or was it tired and painful?

Nerwen gritted his teeth and fought for something abstract, including one freedom, no, my freedom. In the end, the remains of the phoenix were obtained.

And at first, it was the Orc Road. In a hopeless situation, Eleanor, Farseer, and Celia came to my rescue.

“…I do not know.”

I think it was a little fun to say I didn’t like it. It wasn’t enough to just say it was good.

“It’s fortunate.”

“But, how about that?”

Celia opened her mouth with difficulty.

“I thought Enerel could be happy if we were together.”

“What?”

“Farseer-san treats Enerel well, and Nerwen-san seems to be able to do anything if she gets scolded.

that’s unreasonable For me, I think it’s a miracle that the relationship hasn’t deteriorated as much as it is now.

But even this relationship won’t last forever. Even if I think of it as positively as possible, the reason they follow me is nothing more than sorry.

Eleanor only regards me as a ‘subject of the Empire who has been unfairly borrowed’, and is only trying to pay off the debt for that ‘illegal borrowing’.

Nerwen has not yet found a new purpose in life, so he is just following me by inertia. If you find out for yourself what’s really important, you’ll leave.

Farseers still don’t know what’s inside. Maybe one day I will have to ask. However, even that won’t last forever.

“You know. I may have overestimated myself. I may have underestimated how many wounds Mr. Enerel has suffered.”

Celia’s intention was simple. It was a very obvious, innocent, and unrealistic goal.

“I thought that if we all got together somehow, we would be able to live happily like before. If this happens, if this happens…”

She clenched her fists so tightly that her hands trembled.

“The magic I used to ask Enerel to live, the words that said there would be hope… are all irresponsible words.”

was worried about me

I was blaming myself for the fact that she couldn’t give me any help or happiness.

“Maybe it’s really too late, but still, you can’t die. If you die, if you die, it’s all over…”

I forced her fist open. Soft hands swayed here and there.

Celia’s fist, which she clenched with her best effort, was so fragile and fragile that it was only at a level that I could easily open it with my own strength.

“Who are you trying to kill?”

Her gaze was right in my eyes. It was proof that he hadn’t mistaken the person he was talking about.

“You can’t force me to live. I just asked you to live, and I just listened to you.”

It was she who showed me sweet dreams, but they didn’t manipulate me. It’s just that I passed.

Like an addict who has tasted the taste of gambling, the ‘happy future’ she showed me at first glance seems too sweet, so I just run to find the hope of returning.

“So, don’t worry.”

If I become more unhappy, it is not her fault. It was my choice.

Perhaps understanding, Celia nodded slowly.