112 – Winter (3)

Three days have passed since then.

It was enough time to recover the energy of the body, but not enough time to drive away all the dark clouds hanging over the heart.

Could it be because of the nervousness that the conferment ceremony is just around the corner by tomorrow?

Or is it because of the guilt of blindly ignoring the earnest voices longing for my help?

With my head full of muddled thoughts, I couldn’t make a decision.

Even though I was feeling the regret that it was an emotional judgment, I was also feeling the relief that it should have been like this a long time ago.

Even I couldn’t clearly define the color of my heart.

So, for now, the only thing I could do was chew on my rash decisions from time to time.

It’s too late to come back now. Clearly this is the best.

I tightly closed my eyes to harden this cowardly decision that I don’t know how to look back on myself in the distant future.

”Whoa…”

After taking a little bit of the heavy heart on my neck, I leaned against the wall for a while to support my body, which was about to stumble for unknown reasons.

Even so, I did not forget to pay attention not to spill the contents of the small tray in my hand to the outside.

I wasn’t proud.

Now, rather than this being my achievement, I had to see it as a kind of imposition that had been ingrained in my body as a work habit of helping her without a single day of missing a meal.

To be honest, I thought it was less than an hour.

I was grateful that my body moved on its own even when my mind was so confused.

”Priest Rage…!”

It was then.

Someone’s urgent voice from behind violently shook my consciousness, which had been cluttered with distracting thoughts.

”Here you are… Ha, you’ve been looking for a long time…”

”Sister Marianne…?”

The identity of the voice was that of Sister Marianne, whose face was clearly marked by deep fatigue.

After that day, her physical health was completely restored, but Sister Marianne, who took over all her duties in place of Sister Beltane, who had not yet returned to consciousness for some reason, was noticeably emaciated compared to before.

It was nothing special.

The usual workload of Sister Beltane, who oversees all the affairs of the monastery here, was so dizzying that I had only experienced a part of it the other day.

What’s more, the event of the century called the conferment ceremony of the divine protection is in full swing right now.

It was a video without even looking at what kind of hell Sister Marianne, who had to make up for that great absence between death and life, would be experiencing right now.

”The hero is creating a commotion again! Apis-sama and Dauna-sama don’t seem to have the slightest intention to stop this! At least, the big team is cooperating, but the opponent is the opponent, so it’s in a sluggish state. So, priest! Couldn’t you come over here even for a moment as soon as the work you’re doing is over…!”

”Ah yes·····.”

In front of Sister Marianne’s desperate appeal, who seemed to be threatening with a look on her face that if she refused, she would cry and collapse right here, as a weak-minded person, I had no choice but to nod.

I could clearly see what kind of commotion the hero was going through right now.

After the recent assassination scandal, the hero, who was said to be impossible for a known hero to give in to his sexual desire and overlook the existence of an intruder, said he would cut off his desire out of nowhere and locked himself in a room. I’ve come to start practicing.

Although it was unknown what kind of ascetic training the hero wanted to do in detail.

Read at noblemtl.com

Judging from the testimony of one of the victors who went into the room with my spare clothes and a few personal items that would have been strongly saturated with my smell just before entering the practice, I could vaguely guess that it was not a proper practice. .

Fortunately, when I earnestly asked him to come out, he came out.

It was quite unsavory and it was a method that might seem masculine at first glance depending on the viewer, but it was the only way to convince the warrior who was trying to protect it as long as the world and the world were turned upside down once I made up my mind.

”Tell the big team that we’re leaving soon…”

”Go, thank you. Rage’s priest…”

As if a heavy worry had been relieved, Sister Marianne sighed for a while.

It was around the time that the messy atmosphere was gradually being sorted out.

I also threw a question to her that I had been keeping for a long time.

”More than that, how is Sister Beltane? Are you feeling better than before?”

”Yes, you still haven’t completely recovered from the shock of the incident, but I think you’ll be able to come to your senses by the end of the ceremony, seeing as your consciousness returns.”

”Ha, that’s all, I’m glad…”

A feeling of relief surged from the depths of his chest.

Because it was me who first healed Sister Beltane, who was in a state of unconsciousness and was wandering between death and near death.

Of course, I did my best within the limits I could, and I was belatedly told that it was a perfect prayer from Sister Marianne, who checked her whole body.

As long as the consciousness of the really important Sister Beltane was opaque, it was unavoidable that dark insecurities would sprout one after another in the corners of her heart.

”Hey, but Rage’s priest… If you’ll excuse me, may I ask what you’re doing right now…?”

”Yes? As you can see, I was bringing breakfast to the saintess?”

Even though there was a division, it was still my job to take care of her.

The difficulty of the job itself was nothing more than a so-called chore with many replacement talents, but because of her insistence that she wouldn’t even eat anything other than the meal I handed her, it was inevitable that she would take on this task.

”The throne room is the exact opposite here…”

”·····”

That embarrassing silence, which was difficult for both of them to bear, was only able to subside when I, who had blushed in an instant, rushed toward the audience room with my belatedly returned mental head.

◈◈◈

”Lady. It’s breakfast time.”

Was it because he wanted to subconsciously make up for the embarrassing reality of a moment ago?

The voice naturally became heavy without any effort.

infinitely cold. endlessly cruel.

That nonchalant voice, where not even the remnants of emotion could be found, must have been colder than silence to her, who was accustomed to my voice, which always struck me.

”Oh, brother…”

But she persisted even with that terrifyingly cold greeting.

That pitiful ringing in my throat, like a thin feather stroking my ear, would have frightened me just a few days ago.

Was it because, in fact, the suspicion that all of this might be her acting to arouse my sympathy was wrapped around my thoughts.

Far from being agitated, on the contrary, it gradually calmed down.

There was no longer a trace of the emotionless attitude she always wore.

It seemed like he was afraid of my unfamiliar appearance, which was so different from his memories, but hesitantly trying to come closer to me, wringing out a little courage, seemed indescribably dangerous.

but.

”I would have told you not to call me brother. Holy Maiden.”

”Hush!”

It was a fact that it was easy to tell just by looking at the astonished expression of the saintess that the resolute tone that came out of my mouth did not add the slightest hint of mercy.

”Come on, here. fork and knife. I’ll just watch from the side until you finish eating today. I’ve said it over and over again, but I’ll never feed it in the future. You know that.”

”Huh! Wow…”

”The answer is.”

”Ah, ah… Ahh·····.”

”answer.”

”Wow! Yes, yes…”

From now on, I will have to eat alone the meals I used to scoop up.

When I first brought up the story, it was the saintess only two days ago who was crying with the momentum to leave the world.

As soon as the saintess burst into tears, and since I had Kang Kyung-soo go out of the audience room without a word, I have never dreamed of such rebellion any more.

The root of the problem was that he had listened to all of her petty indulgences in the first place.

Even if I had only been a little bit harsh with the saintess, at least, if I had just once imprinted on her that such tantrums don’t always bring good results, such a terrible accident would not have happened.

Of course, it wasn’t the saintess’ fault.

I also acknowledged that ignorance is also a sin, but everyone else acknowledges that the closest adult is responsible for a child’s ignorance.

Therefore, in order to rectify such a mistake even belatedly, I had to eat hard from now on.

”Come on, eat. It’s no use if you deliberately eat or drink slowly like last night. After the set time, I’ll just go.”

”Uh-oh!”

”You have to answer.”

”Yes, yes! Yeah yeah…”

After that ultimatum, the saintess’ breakfast finally began.

The pitiful figure dipping and eating the tear-stained breakfast with a wooden fork clenched tightly in a fist was a sight I would never have been able to bear to face.

”Huh! Whoops! hahahaha! Ooh, ooh…”

Patter. Patter.

More food dripped than went into her mouth, and the incessant tears mixed with the gooey sauce that splattered all over her face, slandering her beautiful face.

But even though I was looking at that pitiful sight head-on, I couldn’t even feel the slightest bit of sympathy in my heart.

no. shouldn’t have happened.

For someone who tried to take someone’s life carelessly, this level of suffering could not be regarded as suffering.

This level of corporal punishment was nothing to make her realize the weight of life.

”Don’t cry and eat right. Don’t even leave it.”

”Yes, yes! yes! Ugh! Yes!”

It was only a few tens of minutes.

Why did that fleeting moment feel like a moment of perseverance that seemed to last forever?

I don’t know.

decided not to know