137 – IF . I am a teacher and you are a student (4)

* * * *

Time passed, and by the time Lilithiana was getting used to this school.

“Do you have time this weekend? With me…”

“no.”

“uh?”

“I don’t like it.”

“…Isn’t it okay to listen to people’s words to the end before making a decision?”

A conversation that would happen in the back of the school if this were Japan.

However, it was natural that students could not even set foot in the back of the school in a country called Korea due to CCTV and strict crackdowns by teachers.

So, as the next best option, I chose the confession place under the overpass leading to the soup kitchen.

To be precise, it was in a corner that was a little off the bridge.

‘Oops, we met eyes.’

What is the point of facing this kind of situation when faculty members go out to eat together?

Lilithiana met my eyes and said to the male student who called her out.

“I don’t want to give it away. Rather than making them think it’s possible, I want to make it clear.”

A stern and cold tone.

In each tone of voice, indifference to the other person and lack of even a hint of goodwill are clearly revealed.

“…Even the person you like.”

“Because there is, I hope that you can give up that feeling as soon as possible. To be honest, even now, I am enduring a lot of uncomfortable things.”

She turns her head away from the male student and approaches me.

It seems that the 4th period PE class has just ended, and he is drenched in sweat.

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Just by looking at his appearance, he’s a grown-up, so this gives me a very strange feeling.

With the sound of footsteps, he came close to me and raised his head toward me.

Lilithiana is not short, but compared to my height of 180, she is small.

The cold eyes that were directed at the male student just before are nowhere to be found.

There was only pure love in his eyes toward me.

“no.”

“uh?”

what is not

I was curious about the next line of the line he spat out, but it was more embarrassing than that.

“Oh.”

“Mr. Kim is popular.”

Again, I was in a situation where I was going to eat with the faculty members.

But approaching it like this is a bit… It was a lot of trouble.

“I’ve never had a proper conversation with him. I don’t even know his name. I’m not interested.”

“Uh, uh…”

“So… please don’t misunderstand me.”

“Oh my gosh.”

“Oh my God, I’m actually seeing things I used to see on TV.”

oh please

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Just don’t tremble by the side.

I wanted to grab my throbbing hair, but I couldn’t.

Because Lilithiana’s hand held my sleeve.

“So.”

Lilithiana’s eyes alternated between the English and music teachers among the teachers I went to eat with.

Coincidentally, both are women. It’s also pretty pretty.

“Teacher too…”

“me too?”

“…no.”

Lilithiana let go of her sleeve, feeling downcast.

I want to convey my heart properly, but I feel regret for not being able to do so.

“Today, it’s the teacher’s favorite boiled egg. Enjoy it.”

Lilithiana nodded and walked toward the classroom.

Resentment and sadness can be seen in every step and gesture… I hope it’s because of my mood.

“Mr. Kim, you just pretended not to know.”

The English teacher, who had been trembling until just now, asked.

“Oh, did you show off a lot?”

“Yes…Lily looked very pitiful.”

“Somehow the eyes we see are looking at us with those eyes when a young child tells us not to take away his belongings.”

The music teacher was there to help.

At this school, it became an open fact that Lily liked me.

“Poor Lily, why do you have to like the teacher?”

And rumors spread that I would vehemently reject such a pretty girl’s approach.

It wasn’t a rumor, but it was true.

The reason was the caution from the head of the student department who was advised by the vice principal.

“I originally said that I was acquainted with Mr. Kim, right? Maybe that’s why.”

“…All I did was give Lily directions when she arrived in Korea.”

“Teacher too, that period is the time when everything blooms. It’s not another kid, but since I met Mr. Kim first, would a person of the same age have a last name?”

“That doesn’t mean I can’t accept it.”

“That’s what…”

As if there was no proper solution for this part, both of them kept their mouths shut.

The same was true for Lily, who was always bright 24 hours a day, strangely dark.

It would have been better if Lily had been a mediocre student.

It’s so unique that people around you can’t even do this.

Western values that seem to presuppose love regardless of age or origin.

A savvy personality who can get along well with anyone.

Looks like an idol or an actor.

To be honest, her appearance makes me wonder if I can actually see a girl prettier than Lily in my life.

Such a child is doing something he shouldn’t be doing, but he can’t even scold him.

I’ve become less proud of what I have.

When I tried to bluntly avoid it, it took several days for him to approach me with a bright smile.

Now, they look at me as if begging me not to avoid them, but what can we say?

“Even so, I can’t help but feel sorry for you when I see you like that.”

“For the sake of the students, as a teacher, it is the right thing to do.”

“If I don’t forget that feeling by the time I graduate, I don’t think I’ll think about it seriously or soothe myself with words like that…”

The music teacher went on and then fell silent.

It was because I realized that I had made a mistake when I saw my expression.

“Before I’m a student, I’m a person. I don’t really want to play with people’s minds.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s okay. Let’s go get something to eat.”

* * * *

Someone knocked on the classroom door.

A glimpse of the silhouette. I couldn’t have known

“…come in.”

drooling.

With a hesitant gesture, Lilithiana opened the door and entered.

A Korean language book in one hand.

“There is a sentence I don’t understand well…because I am a foreigner.”

That’s what caused Liliciana to visit me these days.

He mentions his origin as a foreigner and uses his inexperience in Korean as an excuse.

“What sentence is it?”

“Here…this.”

The sentence Lily pointed out was ‘I bought seolleongtang, but why can’t I eat it’ from Hyun Jin-geon’s ‘Lucky Day’? The main character, Kim Cheom-ji, lamented.

“Why is this?”

“Why is the main character desperately looking for his wife, whom he treated so coldly? Wasn’t the main character not loving his wife?

“…”

Sincerity felt in the middle of the day.

As a famous Korean teacher, there was no way I couldn’t understand this level of metaphor.

‘Foreigners are idiots, I’ve said enough to use this sentence like this.’

His application skills are superior to that of most Korean students.

Why are you treating yourself harshly by using Hyun Jin-geon’s novel?

Then, like Kim Cheomji in this novel, he asks if he has the confidence not to regret it.

I raised my head slightly and turned my gaze from the textbook to Lilithiana.

tight lips.

While he expresses his will to be serious, the anxiety and sadness felt inside are strangely uncomfortable.

… … why?

Doubts arose.

How can I know what this child is thinking?

Why is this child sad now, what is he feeling right now? I doubted that I could know all that.

And why I feel uncomfortable with those feelings.

– I love you, Lily.

sticky-.

He grimaced with the strange pain on his face.

“Kim Cheom-ji was just… a person who was pessimistic about his situation of not being able to properly feed even one of his wives and lived surrounded by feelings of inferiority and guilt. He only lamented that he was a petit bourgeois.”

“In a nutshell, he’s a tsundere.”

“…If you use it that way in the test, it’s wrong.”

“I know, sir.”

Lilithiana took a step back and greeted.

“Thank you, sir. Next time I don’t know anything else, I’ll ask.”

“You say that and come to visit me every day…”

Knock knock.

Now I don’t listen to anything and leave.

Through the door came an inaudible voice.

“…I’m crazy. There’s no way anything will get better.”

* * * *

It was the next day.

The next day, as usual, Lilithiana came to visit me. Aren’t you tired?

“No, rather than that, why do you visit the teacher’s house on the weekend?”

“…He said that if there’s something you don’t understand, you can come to me anytime.”

First time.

This is the story of Lilithiana’s first visit to the teacher’s office with a textbook.

“You have the teacher’s number.”

“I don’t know if I don’t see and teach myself.”

“…”

To say that, the score of the last Korean test was 95 points.

When I rolled my eyes, Liliciana scratched her head and averted her gaze.

“ha.”

A deep sigh I exhaled without even realizing it.

Lilithiana’s shoulders shook greatly.

“Lily student I…”

“500,000 won.”

“……Do whatever you want. I’m tired too.”

Ignoring Lilithiana, I turned my back and tried to enter the house.

If only my sleeve hadn’t been caught by Lilithiana.

“Even when we first met, you didn’t treat me so coldly.”

“So you’re saying that it’s been a while since you met me. There are a lot of men in the world.”

Especially if it’s Lilithiana, you’ll really be able to choose as you like.

“If it’s a nuisance, I’ll wait until graduation.”

“Don’t say things like that easily. Three years is surprisingly long. You might get caught up in what you said.”

“…Can’t you just be a student?”

He nodded softly at Lilithiana’s question.

“I’m a student, so I can’t.”

even resolutely.

He also nailed the job after graduation.

Lilithiana and I don’t get along.

I’ve never belittled my natural appearance, but compared to Lilithiana, it’s a pearl necklace on a pig’s neck.

Of course, the difference in appearance was further supported by being ten years older than Lilithiana.

The difference between the positions of a teacher and a student made my attitude even more determined.

It’s still a student, so Liliciana has a look that will shine the moment she becomes an adult.

If you become an actress, you will become a rare actress who can bewitch people with her looks alone.

If they become an idol, the group will be able to enter the charts just by her presence on the Billboard charts.

I don’t know why that kid has a crush on me, but it’s for the best.

I don’t want to torture you with hope, since you’ll be far apart when you become an adult anyway.

Rather than knowing the bitterness of reality, I thought it was better to experience the sweet first love.

like that.

I deceived my heart by saying that it was for Lilithiana.