8. Theodora – Changed (1)

It is extremely difficult to explain what Maxim Appart was like to Theodora Benning. Even Theodora herself did not know how dependent she was on Maxime. The only thing that is certain is that Maxim Appart saved and changed everything about Theodora Benning.

That fact alone made it easy to guess that their catastrophe would be tragic.

got a fiancée

These were the last words Theodora heard before parting with Maxime. Maxim’s attitude has obviously been strange for the past few months. I deliberately reduced the amount of time we were together, couldn’t make eye contact while talking, and reduced skinship little by little.

Theodora deliberately ignored the signal. Denied reality. I intentionally avoided talking and forcibly attached myself. But in the end, I couldn’t stop Maxim.

It was after the graduation ceremony that Maxim said goodbye.

“why….”

I tried to convince myself that there must be a reason, that there must be a reason Maxim couldn’t tell her, but Maxim gave only one answer.

“I became a knight in order to succeed in the first place.”

Thanks to a good fiancé, I can succeed without having to struggle. Maxim said so. Theodora couldn’t look straight at his expression. I didn’t have the confidence to look. If I saw that expression, it seemed that something inside me would be destroyed as it is.

“…then can’t you just come to me? It was a joke at the time, but you can really stay at my house as a son-in-law. My house, it’s not a family that goes anywhere, and we have a lot of money.”

Theodora said it with a squeeze. did you cry Most likely, he must have been crying in an ugly way.

“Me too… I will try harder. I will become a knight who can create your success.”

“…Sorry.”

I wish I hadn’t said I’m sorry. Theodora couldn’t even remember what she said or did next. He must have said something inconceivably harsh.

That day, instead of being broken, something within Theodora changed.

The lively eyes turned cold and cold, and the soft tone hardened. The smile gradually disappeared from his face, leaving only the occasional cynicism. People whispered that Theodora had returned to her former self.

Theodora’s first assignment was rough. It was in the north and was always covered with snow except in summer, and the snow-covered valleys were infested with monsters. It was one of the borders of the kingdom. There, Theodora wrote down achievements that can only be described as legends.

A legend, or a ghost story. Rivers of blood and mountains of corpses. Theodora killed the beast like a man possessed by a demon. There was no such thing as a holiday. Theodora went to the front without missing a day and slaughtered the demons.

Theodora became a hero and swordsman in Kips in just three years. The reputation of the new promising player of the Liant kingdom resonated throughout the continent. Even the furthest kingdom from the center of the continent could hear Theodora’s name.

There were as many suitors as the stars in the sky for Theodora, and a family that did not bring up a marriage story was harder to find than a family that did. But Theodora paid no attention to all these requests. When he said that he would live with the sword as his companion, looking only at the sword, the marriage conversation was cut off at some point.

Benning tried to win Theodora’s heart somehow, but Theodora’s name had already surpassed Benning’s.

Theodora Benning of Snow Country. It was a nickname attached to Theodora, who was lofty and lonely.

It was last spring that Theodora was informed about a change of place of work.

“…The Raven Knights?”

“I don’t understand why they want to appoint someone like you to be the leader there.”

The one who delivered the news to Theodora with a sigh was Rania Elgar, the leader of the Snow Leopard Knights in charge of the Kips region. Her trademark short-cut red hair was caressing the eyepatch covering her left eye.

Theodora’s transfer would cause a huge power loss to the Snow Leopard Knights. However, it was also true that she was relieved at the thought of being able to send her, who had been so zealous that she felt dangerous, to the warm royal road. Rania spoke in a voice that was half regretful and half affectionate.

“The royal breath must have been strong. They are trying to resurrect the Knights of the Ravens.”

“I can’t… refuse?”

Rania felt that Theodora who said that was both admirable and pitiful. What do people have to go through to change like this? Although she didn’t show much in front of her, Rania always sympathized with Theodora.

“As you may have known at the time the story of the royal family came out, it was a personnel order directly from the center… I can’t help it either. I’m sorry, Theodora.”

“What does the royal family want?”

Rania shrugged and opened the drawer of the office desk and started rummaging. Not long after, Rania climbed onto the desk, holding a stiff and luxurious envelope in her hand.

Rania turned the envelope over and showed Theodora the wax seal sealing the entrance. Above the bright red wax, a lion with a knife in its mouth was looking straight ahead. It was the mark of the royal family.

“…Did you send the edict directly from the royal family?”

“yes. arrived a while ago There was nothing telling you not to see it, so you can read it.”

Rania carefully unsealed the envelope. Theodora carefully picked up the burdensomely expensive letterhead from inside the envelope.

“…The glory of the Knights of the Raven was the glory of the Empire. Jim has recently given Theodora Benning, the vice-captain of the highly reputed Knights of the Snow Leopard, who is called the swordsman of Kips, the position of leader, and entrusts full authority over its reconstruction to achieve the soaring of the jackdaws.”

Rania gave a faint smile.

“They say they completely overhaul the organization, but they say you can do whatever you want. He must have really wanted to play a pivotal role.”

“…But among the existing members, those with the will and ability are told not to be kicked out.”

“Because if you change everything at all, it’s like creating a new knights.”

Rania leaned her chin and looked at the letter in Theodora’s hand.

“It means you have to have an assortment.”

“…is that so.”

Theodora fiddled with the stationery nervously. Rania comforted Theodora.

“it’s okay. what an honor You can take the lead in rebuilding a knighthood, and you have full authority over the process.”

“Honor and power are not what I want.”

“You say you don’t know. Fame is tiring, but it’s not just a burden. And power makes life very convenient.”

“For me, as long as I can wield a sword, that is enough.”

A shadow fell over Theodora’s face for a moment. It seemed that the transfer was not very pleasant.

“You were too eager.”

Rania sighed and said.

“You’ve done enough to be active on the frontier, so now work comfortably in the center. I don’t know if the work will be comfortable, but it will be better than here. After a good amount of time, quit the Kingdom Knights and return to your family. and live happily You deserve it.”

Theodora put on a troubled expression.

“…I’m not going back to my family.”

“Then hold on in the center and make a name for yourself. Don’t make things go back to change. Because you can do it.”

Rania handed Theodora a piece of paper with a greeting order written on it. When Theodora hesitated after accepting the paper, Rania issued a congratulatory order.

“Go and rest today, vice-captain. Don’t come out to subdue me secretly again.”

Even Theodora had no choice but to follow Rania’s strict words. Theodora left the director’s office with a fluttering piece of paper.

Is it the royal road?

Theodora looked at the paper for a long time.

‘I thought I would never return to the capital in my life.’

Memories rose like bubbles in Theodora’s head. Theodora dispelled the memory bubble with a light shake of her head. But her eyes were already sunken.

‘If I go to the royal road, I won’t even go near the academy.’

The memory of that person was a great salvation and wound to Theodora, and it was like a sanctuary that could not be touched and a purgatory that one should not step into.

Even when she tried to tell herself to stop forgetting, the damn memory didn’t leave Theodora alone. Those touches, those voices, those lips, those eyes tormented her day and night. Using that sadness as fuel, he burned himself endlessly in the snowy ridge of the demonic realm.

It’s been 3 years since I spent like that. I can’t say I’ve never recovered, but at least I can say that I’ve returned to a normal human life. Even if you wash your eyes, you won’t be able to find it.

‘Let’s go.’

Even returning to the capital, you can still wield the sword. Because the only thing left for her, now empty, was to become a seeker.

A week later, Theodora said goodbye to the North. Rania, the leader of the Snow Leopard Knights, was having a private meeting with the former vice-captain who was about to leave. She stroked Theodora’s cheek, which was slightly red from the cold. For three years, he gave her affection like a younger sister.

“Take care of yourself. I will write a letter, so please reply.”

Rania abruptly hugged Theodora to hide her tears. Theodora mumbled in her arms as she answered.

“You should be well, Captain.”

Theodora returned to the kingdom like that. Without imagining what would happen to you.

—

It’s a lucky day.

The messenger thought so. All in all, today I was on an errand from the leader of the Jackdaw Knights, delivering a letter to the most promising knight in the kingdom.

Of course, if you were to deliver a letter to the most promising knight in the kingdom, you might think it was an honor, but the knight who received the letter didn’t look very good. A chill ran through the room. It was early summer, but goosebumps from the cold now sprouted from the messenger’s body.

“…Is it true that you brought it properly?”

The voice was like a blizzard. The messenger did not dare to raise his head and froze in his seat. There was no way that the question would have come to my ears.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry, but what did you say…”

“I asked if this letter really came from the Knights of the Ravens.”

The messenger nodded hurriedly. Under the influence of that power, he couldn’t imagine that the question Theodora had just asked was strange.

“Yes Yes! sure! sure! I brought it from a meeting with the leader at the headquarters of the Raven Knights just over an hour ago!”

After hearing the messenger’s words, Theodora’s expression did not change, but the sense of intimidation she radiated grew stronger.

“Hee… Hee!”

The messenger let out a small scream involuntarily. But Theodora’s intimidation held him to his feet and he did not dare to move. The messenger swallowed dry saliva. Are you sure you don’t want to cut it? He stared at the longsword hanging from Theodora’s side with pupils shaking as if in an earthquake.

Theodora folded the letter in half and placed it on the table beside her. Raising her head, she seemed to realize that the messenger hadn’t left the room yet.

“You may go. Thanks for your work.”

“Yeah! thank you!”

The messenger opened the door and left without looking back. Even forgetting to close the door. But Theodora, whether the door was open or closed, did not notice such trifles.

“…ha.”

A sigh escaped from between her lips. She picked up the letter and read it again. I read it twice or three times to make sure I didn’t read it wrong. However, the vice-captain’s name written in the middle of the letter did not change.

Maxime Apart.

The name of a person I thought I would never see again was written on it. Theodora looked at her watch. Less than 30 minutes left until the promised visit time. Theodora rose from her seat and approached the full-length mirror standing in the corner of the room.

“it’s okay.”

I had to keep my composure. Theodora made a face. Do not be agitated. Theodora kept repeating to herself as she trimmed the collar of the gray uniform of the Knights of the Snow Leopard. Through the open door, I could feel the presence of the two soldiers who had arrived for training.

“Captain?”

Theodora left the room. Two soldiers took the lead and started guiding the way.

The streets of the royal capital passed by. Many people’s gazes attached and then fell. However, Theodora’s gaze and heart did not stay in the same space as them. Gradually, the number of people became less and less, and they entered the uphill towards the Knights Headquarters.

Theodora opened her eyes wide. It was to reduce agitation by feeling the presence of Maxim before seeing his face. Her spirit, forged in the snowy mountains of Kips, was soon able to capture Maxim. At the overly familiar feeling, the desire to cry and hatred rose within Theodora at the same time.

are you okay.

Theodora fooled herself like that. He cut all his heart and emotions as if he were cutting them with a knife.

The hill gradually became gentler. The two-story building of headquarters came into Theodora’s field of vision. And the figure of a person standing in front of him also came into her field of vision.

It was the moment when Maxim Appart appeared in front of Theodora for the first time in three years.