31. fall, isolation (1)

“Damn it.”

It was morning.

Two days have passed since that night. Memories of that day flood into my throbbing mind. Water was filled in a bucket placed in front of Maxim. Maxim roughly splashed water on his face, as if trying to get rid of his memory and headache all at once.

“You pitiful bastard.”

Maxim’s hand holding the bucket was strong. Despair begets another despair. Maxim’s hand, which was holding the bucket tightly, trembled.

Maxim splashed the water again. Water droplets dripped down her hair.

“…”

He could see his reflection in the water. deceiver. dissembler. Liar. And he’s a knight, and he’s an insignificant person who pretends to be cool. Maxim faced hundreds of expressions of self-loathing floating on his face.

“It is terrible.”

It was a pretty pitiful feeling. Maxim let out a dejected laugh.

I had hardly slept the night before, and a little tired look appeared on my face. Maxim rubbed his eyes and began putting on his armor. Theodora would distance herself even more. just as you wished so much He hates Maksim and looks at him with disgust, or maybe he doesn’t pay any attention.

“Is it good?”

Maxim’s reflection in the mirror asked Maxim himself.

“It turned out just the way you wanted it. How are you feeling?”

“not good.”

Maxim answers himself.

“If it’s not good, why did you act like that?”

“Then what should I do?”

“I can’t tell you.”

Maxim bit and shook his teeth.

“My family, my family, are in the hands of that county under the name of an arranged engagement. What would a powerless periphery baron do? If I approached Theodora unnecessarily, if I confided everything, something might happen to my family and to her.”

The illusion in the mirror laughs at itself.

“therefore?”

“So? It’s only me who has to shoulder her hatred. As long as I keep my mouth shut and don’t go against them, no one will get hurt.”

“Is that why you’ve been acting in that awkward manner?”

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Noisy.

Maxim’s face contorted.

“You act very comfortably.”

Maxim in the mirror says so.

“Then what do you mean?”

Maxim’s voice trembled as he answered.

“Looking at me who couldn’t use it even if I came because of that damn curse, what should I do? Do you turn on your aura and cut them all to death?”

“Are you asking yourself that now?”

The self in the mirror snorts as if it is absurd.

“Then live like that for the rest of your life. Acting in an ambiguous manner, wandering around and wandering around, but using the self-satisfaction of having saved as much as Theodora as a shield, while continuing to be stabbed by those wounds and thorns.”

bang.

The mirror is cracked. The illusion did not stop mocking Maxim until it was broken.

“Self-reproach won’t save you. You sick bastard.”

Blood dripped from Maxim’s knuckles.

So what can save me? I shouldn’t have hoped for salvation in the first place.

The self in the mirror said no more.

Chunk.

Maxim woke up from his thoughts. The plates of the faded armor were full of scratches made in the past few days. Teeth marks, claw marks. Maxim slowly began to put on the armor. Divide into pieces the legs, arms and chest. Iron armor was covered over Maxim’s underwear.

Maxim put on his helmet and sighed.

Do I have to face you again like this?

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Now Theodora’s Joe had to help with the investigation. Maxim hardened his face. I put on my armor and picked up my sword. The sword was heavy today.

“Damn it.”

Maxim inhaled and exhaled. My head has been ringing frequently lately. There was also confusion in my head.

Maxim grabbed his head. The helmet rang with a thud.

I was short of breath. Maxim took off his helmet for a moment and breathed.

Maybe it’s because I’ve been fighting a lot lately. A cold breath escaped Maxim’s mouth.

“…let’s go.”

Maxim said to himself. Not only the knife, but also the footsteps were heavy. Maxim opened the door and went down the stairs.

It was early. Maxim went out of his residence to check the horse’s condition in advance.

The air in the no man’s land was cold regardless of the season or time. Especially at the point where the sun has just risen like now. Maxim walked the familiar streets. Since morning, some people have been busy. From today on, I will be living in the barracks beyond the city wall again.

In the stable near the city wall, Maxim found his horse. The brown courser made a throb as if he was happy to recognize Maxim.

“Should I comb my hair at least?”

Maxim muttered as he stroked the horse’s head.

Suddenly, the door of the stable opened. It was Paola who appeared backlit by the morning sunlight.

“Oh, Maxim.”

“…Seniors.”

Paola smiled and approached her horse, who was standing next to Maxim.

“Were you busy yesterday even though it was a holiday? I haven’t seen you all day.”

“…I just walked down the street.”

Paola let out a big smile at Maxim’s answer.

“It is good to be young. I don’t have the stamina, or mental stamina, to run around the streets all day. In my heart, I want to go around like you, but… it’s hard at this age.”

Paola shook her head and said.

“What did you do walking around?”

“…just looked at the streets.”

“Well, what can I do?”

Paola put the reins on the horse and unbolted the jaws that held it in place. The horse stepped forward and stepped quickly out of the barn. Paola skillfully put the saddle on the horse and secured it.

“By the way, you don’t look very good after spending a day on vacation, Maxim. Your face is pale.”

As far as anyone can tell, Maxim’s face was dark. Maxim shrugged. His horse was meekly accepting the reins that were being put on it. Maxim fastened the reins and unbarred the horse.

“Everyone has days when they are not in a good mood.”

“I don’t know if you’re clumsy or skillful at hiding it.”

Paola chuckled.

“Maxim, a person cannot live with a problem wrapped up in his arms forever.”

Paola gently stroked the horse’s mane.

“Whether you want to tell it or not, your secrets and worries are destined for someone to find out.”

Paola jumped onto the horse. The horse groaned and walked out of the stable. Maxime frowned at Paola, who was teasing him.

“Do I look troubled?”

“In my eyes, your eyes are more like those of a troubled person…”

Paola looked down at Maxim from her horse.

“It looks like the eyes of a self-blaming person. Or they look like the eyes of a guilty person.”

“…”

Maxim raised the saddle onto the horse’s back. I couldn’t deny Paola’s eyes.

“I didn’t want you to find out that much.”

“People can’t always be the same as wood and stone. Emotions change from moment to moment.”

Maxim looked at Paola and smiled as if it were absurd.

“Isn’t that too opportunistic a defense?”

“Maybe, maybe not.”

Maxim climbed onto the horse.

“All I can do is say the obvious, Maxim. Otherwise, what do you want me to tell you?”

Paola turned her head.

“…Nope.”

“Maxim, in the end, only you can bring someone out of the abyss of worry and despair.”

said Paola, looking up at the sky. Today, the clear blue sky of no man’s land. Paola looked up blankly, as if being sucked up into the sky.

“Well, you are a person with a stuffy side. I don’t know what you’ll think of me.”

Paola smiled at Maxim.

Maxim followed Paola as she rode her horse to the castle wall.

—

Unlike the time when people were immediately sent to the investigation if all the members were gathered, Margrave called the knights and soldiers together. The Marquis’ expression was not so good.

“It seems that the dispatch period of the Jackdaw Knights will be shorter than expected.”

The Marquis spoke in a solemn voice like someone making an important decision.

“3 days.”

3 days?

Maxim frowned.

“After three more days of investigation, if we can’t find evidence that the current decline in monsters in the no-man’s land is ‘not’ a harbinger of something…”

The Marquis sighed.

“Go back to the capital and ask for a report. Along with the report, the request for reinforcements from the troops…”

“Why are you sending it so quickly?”

The eyes of the soldiers and knights gathered.

“Because you have to be prepared.”

“Ready… are you saying?”

“There is no guarantee that a situation comparable to that of 15 years ago will not occur. No, something comparable to, or even surpassing, 15 years ago will happen.”

The soldiers were agitated. This is because there were only a handful of people who had been through the war 15 years ago.

“lie…”

“There’s no way something like that could happen again in just 15 years!”

The outcry spread. The Marquis raised their hands to silence them.

“So, for those who want to deny that this phenomenon is a replay of the reflux of 15 years ago.”

The Marquis’ voice stood firm.

“You’ll have to investigate until your eyes fall out.”

The groups of investigators were divided again. Maxim, as usual, was going to go to the second group, but after receiving the gaze of the Marquis, he turned to the first group.

At the forefront of group 1, Theodora was standing. Similar to Maxim, he was leading a group of soldiers and knights with tired eyes.

“As you heard, we don’t have much time left.”

Those eyes looked at Maxim and hurriedly headed elsewhere.

“…As before, I would like to ask you to investigate with all your might.”

After Theodora’s words, the horses started running toward the wilderness. Theodora recalled what had happened two days ago while on a rocking horseback.

i’m crazy

Theodora’s face turned blue rather than red. Drank too much. Seeing the vice-captain wandering around Maxim’s side, anger rose inside that he shouldn’t have. Even though there is no reason to hate, even though there is no reason to be angry. Theodora secretly turned her eyes to the table where Maxim was sitting and peeked at him.

and then drank

I was not good at drinking, so I continued to drink from the glass. I thought anger could be an excuse. Rationalizing her actions like that, Theodora drank. The urge was scary. Even when the people around her were drunk and fell asleep one by one, Theodora’s eyes were on Maxim’s seat.

Christine, the vice-captain approached Maxim casually and leaned on his shoulder. Maxim pretends to be indifferent and seems to be ignoring her, but he doesn’t pull his shoulder out. Instead, she slightly changed her posture to make it easier for the vice-captain to lean on.

drink that again

Drinking after seeing Maxim answering all the complaints of the vice-captain who was drunk and talking.

I drank again as I watched the vice-captain fall into Maxim’s embrace.

I poured my emotions down my throat. I thought that if I passed it with alcohol, this hatred and pain would disappear.

And the seat is over. Theodora hugged her glass and dazed. Thoughts and emotions seemed to be buried deep with the drink, as she had hoped.

But, ironically, it was the heart that lifted her up.

Intoxication took over. I saw my ex-lover in front of my blurry hair and in front of my eyes.

then, then…

Theodora shook her head. It wasn’t. I shouldn’t have hugged Maxim because I couldn’t overcome my drunkenness. There is nothing left. I only had scars left.

and was rejected

Alcohol was no excuse for them. Oh yeah. Only the remaining scars increased. I thought I was getting stronger, but I guess that wasn’t the case that day.

“…blind.”

Theodora raised her head.

“Captain?”

It was the vice-captain, Christine. Theodora asked again, calming her shaking heart.

“What happened?”

“Recently, while examining the topography, I felt that the ground on the cliff side was getting more and more unstable, and I think I need to be careful with this survey as well.”

Christine was staring at Theodora’s blank expression. Theodora quickly changed her face so that her troubles would not be seen in those eyes.

“It’s the instability of the ground, so I wonder if it’s related to the anomaly.”

“Yeah. During a recent investigation, some people said they felt vibrations of unknown cause… We need to find out more about the connection, but I think it would be nice to conduct an investigation with that fact in mind.”

Theodora nodded.

“All right. Let’s proceed with the investigation centering on the ground.”

“…By the way, Captain.”

Theodora looked at Christine. It looked hesitant. The little puffiness under her eyes made it seem like she hadn’t slept well.

“What happened the other day?”

“What’s going on…”

Theodora instantly froze at Christine’s words. Christine watched Theodora’s reaction, then closed her eyes and sighed.

“No… no.”

One team of investigators arrived at the place where the horses were to be tethered. Christine murmured as she dismounted.

“I’ve never been attacked by monsters since I came.”

“It’s very different from usual.”

Maxim answered, tying his horse some distance away from Christine.

“…I have a bad feeling today.”

said Christine, looking at the edge of the cliff in an uncharacteristically serious voice.

“It will be fine.”

“Senior, today your voice is empty.”

Christine glared at Maxim in displeasure. Maxim couldn’t face Christine’s persistent gaze.

“…why?”

“Let’s investigate quickly.”

Christine pushed Maxim’s back. Maxim staggered, but willingly followed Christine’s pushing hand. It would be better now than investigating in Team 2, which few people knew. You might even get a chance to talk to Theodora.

Group 1 was scattered to investigate. Following orders to examine the ground in detail, Maxim walked slowly along the cliff, contemplating the ground he felt beneath his feet.

“…exactly…”

It didn’t feel very solid and full. Maxim felt the ground with his feet. The ground to be stepped on was not heavy.

“It’s not very stable.”

Maxim murmured and raised his head.

“…”

little distance away. Theodora was walking in the opposite direction. Theodora hardened her expression as soon as she saw Maxim’s face. I’d rather say it’s less awkward when I see it for the first time in three years. The two of them couldn’t even change the direction of their gait, and they were frozen in place, unable to utter a word.

And the two of them drew their swords at the same time before they could say anything.

Maxim felt the energy of a monster creeping up from the bottom of the cliff, and Theodora felt the energy of another group of monsters approaching.

“…Let’s solve this first.”

When Maxim said that, Theodora agreed with a displeased expression.

He saw Mantis and a large Fenrir among the Hellhounds. The ones climbing up the cliff are Basilisks, Hexpeds, and giant centipede monsters. Maxim relaxed his arms and body, inhaling and exhaling slowly.

Maxim turned toward the cliff and stood back to back with Theodora.

“Support is…”

“I will be back soon. You must have sensed something wrong.”

Theodora’s voice was hard. Maxim sharpened his nerves.

There are about seven of them coming up. If this is enough…

Maxim glanced back at Theodora. Theodora faces ten enemies. If we were to use our full strength from the start and defeat it, we would probably be able to finish it in an instant. Theodora’s sword trembled and began to emit a platinum light.

It seemed like he was thinking of ending it quickly.

Maxim set aside his worries about Theodora for a while and faced the monsters creeping up.

‘Live like that for the rest of your life.’

Those words lingered in Maxim’s mind. In order to get rid of those words, Maxim began to fight the monsters that were coming up with a big movement.

I decapitated the first basilisk that came up. Because it has a demonic eye that paralyzes anyone it encounters, it was the first target to aim for. Facing opponents coming up and dropping them was much easier than dealing with them on flat ground. Maxim cut off the head of the seventh and threw it down the cliff without much difficulty.

Theodora…

Maxim turned his head back. Theodora was emitting a platinum-colored aura and was easily slaughtering the remaining monsters. However, Fenrir, who was treated as a high-ranking monster, was quickly responding to Theodora’s offensive. Maxim quickly stepped out to join her.

It was then that Maxim felt an unusual vibration in the ground.

“…no way.”

Maxim’s face went pale.

sh*t.

Cracks were spreading over the wilderness including the cliffs. weak ground. Maxim erased everything from his mind and shouted.

“Theodora!!”

She had just plunged the sword into Fenrir’s neck. Theodora turned her head at Maxim’s call,

The cliff on which Maxim and Theodora were standing began to collapse with a roar.