Buh-buh-buh-buh-buh-buh…

I’m standing in front of the door of Yuika’s room.
There was a mysterious bass sound. After school, I came here as usual, chit-chatted with her mother, lightly instructed Yuika’s younger brother on where to hide his treasured books, and came to her room to find this sound.

“I hope it doesn’t get weird again…”

Hoping that wishful thinking will not turn out to be a fleeting hope, I knocked as usual.

“Yuika, I’m coming in.”
“Hmmm, you’re here, Souta. Prepare yourself. Today is the time to pay your annual tribute!”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about, but if it’s tributes, I think I’ve been paying it for quite a while…”

On the first and fifteenth of every month, I offered prepaid cards and sometimes bought gifts like the donuts the other day. If the tribute is not enough for her, her vice-general should ask, “can’t you see the crest?”
[TLN: The crest shows someone that should be treated with respect.]

I thought, but it seems that I don’t need a vice general or a rambunctious dancer.
Keeping my eyes on Yuika’s hand, I realized what the mysterious heavy bass sound was.

“Oh, that’s…”
“Hmm, I see you’ve caught on the crest!”
“On the contrary. The old man would never force his people to pay an unfair tribute.”
“Hmm, I think you’ve known the crest!”
“It looks like it’s going to hurt a lot… I’m sure you’ll be fine, old man… instead of going on a journey to fix the world, maybe you should spend some time curing your head.”

I’m not going to go on, so I’ll just say it now: Yuika was holding up a massage machine.
The switch was on, and it was making a heavy bass sound… the origin of that sound was this massage machine.

“Hey, you didn’t do another mail order, did you?”
“Nope. You want a hint?”
“No, thanks. I think I know what it is. Based on the fact that you’ve been sneaking your brother’s comic books to read…”

“That’s right, I stole it from the living room! I found it in the middle of the night when I went to look for some snacks!”
“You don’t just naturally steal from your own home.”

Well, it’s not theft because it’s her house.
It’s not a good expression for Yuika to say that she was ripped off. It’s a sad thing to hear.

“So what are you going to do with that massage machine?”
“It’s obvious, isn’t it?”

Yuika wasted no time in making a pause and spinning around.
She posed with her hair in a fluffy dance and thrust the machine at me.

“I’ll massage Souta with this♪ It’s revenge for the other day.”
“Good work. See you tomorrow!”
“I won’t stop you if you want to leave, but is that fine? I’m not wearing a bra today.”
“——What? That’s not fair! I can’t go home if you say that. Is it fun to play with the infantile mind of adolescent boys who think they might have a chance to catch a glimpse!? Is there no justice in this world!?”

I was about to leave, but my legs no longer moved as if they were petrified.
It’s not fair to not wear a bra. It’s never fair to not wear a bra.
She pulled the massage machine to her cheek and gave me a cute upward glance.

“Should I wear a bra then?”
“You don’t have to wear it! I’d rather you didn’t wear it!”
“Yes, yes, Souta is no match for me anyway, so give up and go to bed. Lie down, lie down♪”
“Dang it, I’m sad that I’m within the palm of your hand…”

The last time I had a massage, Yuika stepped all over my hip bones and gave me a terrible time. I’m sure it’s going to be similar this time. But I can’t resist. Boys are such simple creatures.
While I was lamenting, she took away my school bag and made me take off my blazer.
I lay face down in my shirt.

“At the very least, please be gentle…”
“Don’t worry, I’ll take care of it!”
“Wow, the anxiety that ending reminds me of…”

I’m sure the original work is wonderful, but if my childhood friend tries to copy it, it will be a disaster. That’s what my years of experience tell me. I thought it would be absolutely terrible… this time too.

“Okay, let’s begin, shall we? First, the right side of the spine. If it feels good, just tell me it feels good, okay?”

The massage head, which rocked, was applied to the right side of my spine.

“Oh…?”

It feels good.
The vibration of the head is just right to relax my muscles.

“Goo-goo-goo sound came from the middle of my back.”
“Oh, oh, oh…”

Between the scapula and the spine.
The deep parts of the body that are hard to reach by myself are loosened by the small vibrations.

“Yuika, this is… good.”
“I know right?”

I could feel the smug look on her face.
However, I can’t retort because it’s actually effective.

“Yuika, please do that… on other side too. And on the left shoulder, slide it down the… groove.”
“You’re starting to beg, aren’t you? Good, okay, I’ll spoil you.”

The massage head came to the left side. It moved back and forth between my shoulder blades and spine, gently relaxing my muscles.

“Oh… it works. This is… irresistible.”
“Does it feel good?”
“… Honestly, it feels good.”
“How about, ‘thank you, Yuika-chan’?”
“Thank you, Yuika-chan…”

Oh no. I’m losing my ability to think.
I’m responding to Yuika’s comment by reflex. If she asks me for something now, I’m sure I’ll agree to it.
I didn’t think that a massage machine was such a powerful weapon. It looks like it could destroy Carthage.
But, if the head could go in a little deeper…
[TLN: Carthage has a strong wall, but it was destroyed because the walls were penetrated.]

“Yui-Yuika. Give me that for a second.”
“Huh?”

I took the massage machine from Yuika and raised myself up. I sat on the bed and put the head on my back.

“I’m almost at the point where it looks like a pressure point. Maybe push it like this from an angle and… whoa!”

I hit a good spot. A slight lifting angle to the scapula from below. There was a big stiffness here. The head hit the right spot, and a pleasant current ran through my entire arm.

“Oh, oh, oh… This is where it’s really good… I feel like I’m going to melt from my back to my arms.”
“Hey, give it back… I’ll do it for you.”
“Wait, wait. It’s a subtle point that you can’t find unless you do it yourself. It’s like the vibrations are catching the stiffness perfectly. Oh, it’s so relaxing…”
“No, give it back. My massage machine!”

“That’s what you get for stealing stuff. Whoa, I found a new point… The next time, I’ll do it to Yuika’s back. Just a little more.”
“I don’t need it. I don’t have any stiffness anywhere! It’s not that, it’s that I want to do it for Souta.”

“Just a little more, just five more minutes. Wha? Wha? ohhh…”
“Uhmmmm…”

The cheeks of my childhood friend sitting next to me swelled up as I watched.
It’s a danger sign. …I know but I can’t let go of the machine. I’ve finished relaxing my shoulder blades, and now I can’t resist the urge to apply this vibration to my shoulders. Bummer, you can’t beat a massage machine!
As I was thinking such a stupid thing, Yuika, who had reached the limit of her endurance, jumped at me with great force.

“Divine Punishment—!”
“Owa!?”

Yuika landed perfectly between my knees, her arms and legs flailing wildly.

“Don’t be distracted by such inorganic objects! What’s the fun in a stick that only vibrates?
“What? You’re the one who brought it here!”
“Shut up! Souta is here to see me, so please look at me! Just look at me with all your heart!”
“What overwhelming arrogance…”
“I won’t tolerate rebuttals! Leave it, leave it, leave it, leave, it, aside!”
“All right, all right, I got it, princess.”

Sorry, partner. I thought as I let go of the massager.
After that, she handed me a comb and asked me to comb her hair for about an hour, until she was satisfied with my work.
After all, Yuika is more suited to be a selfish and cute princess than a vice-shogun of Mito.
[TLN: This is related to the crest mention before.]

For now.
I’ll buy a massage machine at Donki on my way home. Let’s do that.
[TLN: Donki = Don Quijote, a discount chain store in Japan.]