5. Obsession

The day was bright.

I took my earphones out of my ears, opened the door, and went outside.

Food was set on the table.

It looked like Kyung-hee made it herself, but it didn’t look like she had blood in it.

but did not eat Because I said I would make it in the first place.

Originally, I was thinking of throwing it all away. But, I didn’t have the guts to do that either.

…… I couldn’t help it because I showed sincerity.

Even if I couldn’t, it was obvious that I would have cooked for more than 2 hours.

I didn’t want to provoke Kyung-hee by throwing it all away.

“……Are you awake, Siwoo?”

Kyunghee was haggard. There were exercise books and notes all around.

It seemed like he was writing novels and drawing illustrations on a laptop he didn’t know where he got it from.

“I’ve cooked it. If you want to eat, eat it. If it doesn’t work, don’t…”

Kyunghee hid the medicine bag on the desk.

I tried not to pay attention, but I couldn’t help but look at it.

Kyung-hee smiled strangely, as if confirming my gaze.

I finally feel like they care about me and look after me.

So, as if I was happy, my ears went up slightly, and when I touched the bowl of food, my ears swelled up.

Then, when I saw the bowls of food being pushed aside, my ears went down.

I’m glad I wasn’t so sad.

As expected, he seemed to be immersed in painting and writing again.

It seemed like I should stop paying attention and eat.

I wondered if Kyunghee had used all the ingredients, but it wasn’t.

It was because the refrigerator was full of food.

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Judging from the meat and frozen foods I hadn’t seen, it seemed that Kyung-hee had bought them.

It was Kyunghee’s second trick. It was obvious that I bought it with the thought that I would not eat the ingredients I bought.

I must have used all the original ingredients while cooking like that.

It was an outcall.

It was a demonstration that even if you treat me as invisible, I am deeply involved in your life.

There is no place where our memories have not stayed in this room.

I felt such blatant pleading and obsession.

However, if you choose not to eat rice, you are not a single-handed person.

So I just washed my hair and went outside.

As if he hadn’t expected this, he heard Kyunghee’s flustered voice from behind.

I opened the door and gave a word of thanks to the waiting agents.

After receiving heartfelt advice from the agents, I boarded the elevator.

I didn’t want to eat anything too greasy for breakfast.

I didn’t even want to find something new to eat.

In the end, I had no choice but to go to the lunchbox I had been to before.

It’s one of those restaurants that I usually don’t go to, but today it was no big deal.

It’s not like you can’t cook at home.

Slowly choosing a boxed lunch from the menu and paying at the kiosk, I sat down.

I thought it would be better to go to a restaurant that sells cup rice tomorrow.

You’d better give up eating at home for a while.

If you lose one fight, it will be difficult to win the next.

Because Kyung-hee was like that now.

It was right to go out strong as it is a situation where each cannot give up on the other.

I don’t want Kyunghee to hurt my friends.

I don’t want to see Kyung-hee again, and I don’t want to suffer from obsession either.

Kyunghee wants me to only look at her.

I want to live with me all day long talking and making memories.

But I don’t want my life to be greatly hindered because of him.

So he didn’t imprison me, he imprisoned himself.

He recognized my feelings of not being able to abandon Kyung-hee and imprisoned me with psychological chains.

Because the psychological is much more difficult to solve than the physical.

Certainly, I couldn’t abandon Kyunghee.

But I could change Kyunghee.

I don’t know how long the fight will last, but one thing is certain.

should not lose

“……………..”

lose, no

I don’t know what kind of move Kyung-hee will come up with, but I can’t lose.

If you lose once, that’s it. He continues to be attracted to Kyung-hee.

If that happens, Kyung Hee will never return to normal again.

No, it didn’t matter if it didn’t return to normal.

At the very least, it was necessary to imprint on her that if she tried to obsess in front of me, something sad would happen.

So, I made up my mind again, ate the lunch box provided by the staff, and went to my room.

Kyunghee stood there blankly.

It was like looking at a wall. I’ve heard what it’s doing.

My father said that if he did something wrong, he always did it.

So, starve all day and think about what you’ve done wrong.

And it was a de facto abuse to reflect on not to do that mistake again.

As if that had become a habit, Kyung-hee didn’t move even though she heard a growling sound from her stomach.

He just kept looking at the wall and muttering something.

Food was left on the table.

……..I thought it would be okay to eat after watching the situation.

I don’t know if this behavior was intended by Kyung Hee or not, but I don’t want Kyung Hee to be ruined.

I just want to see the old Kyung Hee happy by my side.

I didn’t want to see a doll that obeyed my words imitate Kyunghee.

So, I opened the plastic bag and wrapped the food one by one.

Then, in order to check the situation, I organized the exercise books and notes that were scattered on the small table.

I even covered my laptop and organized it so that it would not be inconvenient for me to move, and I folded the table and put it in its original place.

Lastly, I read while pretending to put the medicine bag on the floor.

Then I went into my room, locked the door, and put my earphones in my ears.

“……………………………”

At first glance, both the exercise range and notes were in serious condition.

There were a lot of pictures drawn on the practice field.

It was not Kyunghee’s method of drawing three or four pictures on one side, but pictures that covered the entire page.

In those paintings, Kyunghee was either dying or dead in various ways.

There was Kyung-hee, asleep, lying in a puddle that flowed from a wound on her wrist.

There was Kyung Hee falling from the building with an expressionless expression.

yeah, that was fine until then. It was good to see that there was no chance that Kyung-hee would actually commit suicide.

If you feel like dying, if you want to die. Kyung-hee will cling to me even if I hate it.

However, something was wrong with the writing in the note.

I had heard about it on the internet before.

He said that his father once made him and his sister wear camouflage.

The notes were blinking. I wrote countless times and wrote on it, so it became black.

Siu, I’m sorry. Wrong. I won’t. The sentence was repeated.

In addition, when I searched my phone for the name of the drug I had read on the medicine bag, it came up as an antidepressant.

SSRI drugs are commonly used antidepressants.

“………………………………………….”

I let out a long sigh as I decided to calm down.

Kyunghee’s condition is not that serious.

It means you can bear it without speaking to me yet.

If you thought you were going to die and you were going to be ruined, you would have reacted to me.

So, I had to think it was okay. But I couldn’t either.

Eventually, I went out of the room and checked where Kyunghee was.

Even though I openly looked at the exercise book and notes, Kyung-hee did not react.

No, I acted like I wasn’t allowed to react.

Then a piece of paper came out of the notebook.

There was something written on the paper, but it wasn’t that Kyung-hee was writing it down.

Rather, it was correct to see that a person engaged in a professional job wrote it in a stylish handwriting.

So, this was like a note written by a psychiatrist to Kyung-hee.

Severe dependence, lack of affection, and various other mental illnesses are a concern.

It meant that if it was relatively possible, I would persuade my housemate to come with me to the psychiatrist.

It was written that it was easy to solve. Only then did I know that I had been caught in a trap.

Whether Kyunghee intended it or not.

I’m not adamant enough to look at this and move on.

The psychiatrist wrote that it was okay even if I couldn’t convince my partner, but I wasn’t okay.

If the situation could be improved with professional help, I wanted to improve it.

So, it was a temporary truce.

“It’s Kyunghee.”

“………….yes?”

“……………..”

Red eyes that had no life at all shone.

There was no life, so I had the illusion that the eyes were shining even though they should be cloudy.

No, it was not an illusion. It will glow with madness.

Kyung-hee looked at me for a moment and trembled, then fell limp on the floor.

Then, slowly, he opened his arms.

Then, as if he thought he was forcing him to hold him, he lowered his arm.

I confirmed that Kyung-hee’s ears had been going down since before.

At least it didn’t seem like this was planned.

I don’t know why, but it seemed to be a little hopeful that things would work out.

And when I hugged Kyung-hee, my ears slowly rose.

The protruding ears soon trembled.

This time, it seemed that Kyunghee was sincere. So, it felt strangely good.

I didn’t know why I felt good, but one thing was certain.

Kyung-hee can go back to normal.

It is possible to reduce the intensity of pathological love and return to the former state of joy.

I had such an uncertain intuition.